Many people work from home using modern technology today. Some people think that only the workers benefit from this and not the employers. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Technology has already become a crucial part in everyone’s life, which has facilitated people to work online without commuting to their workplaces. Even though it might be seen as it is only advantageous for employees not for managers, I completely disagree with this view because managers can benefit from this trend as well since they can save more money by letting their workers work remotely.
Admittedly, managers can get into troubles if their workers are not in the office because most people tend to loose their concentration and sense of responsibility in their comfort zones. This eventually leads to decreased quality of work and profit a company makes. In addition, if a huge company that occupies really big area does not have people who work there, there is no point of owning that place. However, some soft wares and applications are being created in order to tackle these issues related to online working, namely controlling the workers online. For example, we have a website called Workly which calculates the hours spent on the website and has starting and ending hours. This makes a huge difference in the attitude of employees, making them more aware and responsible.
On the other hand, managers also can make the use of this situation. If a certain company has only a few workers in their workplaces, they can replace it with a smaller one, which helps them spend less money on bills like gas and electricity. Furthermore, workers can save time on commuting and spend it to accomplish assigned tasks on time. This boosts productivity and efficiency of the company. Additionally, this trend can be considered as an advantage when employing new workers because some people are introverted, so they can struggle to fit in the group for a long time, which decreases the productivity not only of that novice worker but it can also influence others around. So facilitating new workers with online trainings and working conditions truly helps the workers and job owners to save time and energy on adaptation process of new employees.
In conclusion, although there some views that suggests that only workers take advantage of working from home, I would argue that it also helps managers and company overall to spend less money on resources and to have fewer problems with newcomers.

7.0

The essay is logically organized and the ideas are connected well. However, there are a few areas where the flow of ideas could be improved. The essay follows a logical structure, but transitions between paragraphs and within paragraphs could be smoother. The introduction sets up the topic well, but the connection between different points could be enhanced with more explicit linking phrases. The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points but could be more comprehensive.

Suggestions

Use more linking words to improve the flow of ideas.
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear central topic.

The essay uses a wide range of vocabulary and there is evidence of some less common and idiomatic language. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choice. The essay demonstrates a good command of a wide range of vocabulary relevant to the topic. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choice that could be revised for clarity. Additionally, the use of more specific examples could enhance the argument.

The essay uses a variety of complex structures. However, there are a few grammatical errors and awkward constructions. The essay uses a variety of sentence structures, which adds variety and interest. However, there are a few grammatical errors and awkward constructions that could be revised for clarity. Additionally, the use of more specific examples could enhance the argument.

The essay addresses the task effectively, presenting a clear position throughout. However, the argument could be more fully developed in places. The essay effectively addresses the prompt by presenting a clear argument that both workers and managers can benefit from remote work. The position is well-defined and supported with relevant examples. However, the essay could be improved by providing more specific examples and data to support the arguments.