Many students find it difficult to focus or pay attention at school nowadays. What are the reasons for this? What can be done to solve this problem? Many students find it difficult to focus or pay attention at school nowadays. What are the reasons for this? What can be done to solve this problem?

Focus and attention at schools are challenges students are facing up with. While this can be attributed to sleep deprivation and outdated way of teaching, the problem can be mitigated by adding prolonged breaks t the schedule and mental health lessons.
One factor contributing to lack of focus and attention at schools is that poor sleep hygiene. Because of overloaded schedule and homework, students sometimes have to stay up to meet task deadlines and prepare for exams, leaving little to no time to sleep longer. This, in turn, can result in plenty of mental health issues, such as anxiety, stress and depression which worsens more productivity levels and attention span. Students with unhealthy mental state, coupled with sleep deprivation are prone to skip lessons or spend their time on sleeping. Therefore, during next lessons, students may not focus on sessions deeply due to lack of understanding about previous lessons. Obsolete approach to teach students at schools can be another reason. Unfortunately, most schools are not up-to-date with lots of interactive and innovative tools to keep students engaged. Since youngsters are addicted to technological devices and modernism, non interactive classes are not attractive enough to pay attention to them.
However, there are a number of ways to alleviated this problem. Introduction of longer break times and extra sessions about mental health and its function would be effective. Based on Chinese education system, which is the country with high performers, students have more spare time, followed by convenient furniture that can be turned to mini beds. If other countries also enforce this policy to the schools where students might have naps between classes, the productivity of them would stagger as a result. Mental health classes, in addition, could be useful for students to find out more stress management and ways to deal with them, decreasing rate of mental issues with students at the same time. Supplying schools with more cutting-edge technology would increase interactivity of lessons. Smart whiteboards, projectors, if any computers, encourage students to attend classes with maximum focus and simultaneously ease the work of teachers.
In conclusion, sleep deprivation and lack of interactivity are the main reasons behind the less focus and attention at schools. This problem can be improved by prolonging break times and adding classes about metal health.

7.0

The essay is logically organized and ideas are connected well. However, there are a few instances where the flow of ideas could be improved. The essay follows a logical structure, but transitions between paragraphs and within paragraphs could be smoother. The introduction clearly states the challenges faced by students and the proposed solutions, but the connection between different points could be enhanced with more explicit linking phrases. The body paragraphs each discuss a single factor contributing to the lack of focus and attention, such as poor sleep hygiene and outdated teaching methods. However, the explanation of how these factors are addressed could be more clearly connected to the overall argument. The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points but could be more comprehensive in linking back to the introduction and the body paragraphs.

Suggestions

Use a variety of cohesive devices to ensure smooth transitions between ideas.

The essay demonstrates a good range of vocabulary and there is some evidence of less common and idiomatic language. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choice. The essay demonstrates a good command of a wide range of vocabulary related to the topic, such as “sleep hygiene,” “mental health,” and “cutting-edge technology.” However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choice that could be revised for clarity and accuracy. The essay uses a variety of vocabulary, but there are some instances of awkward or incorrect word choice that could be revised for clarity and accuracy. For example, the phrase “stagger as a result” could be replaced with “improve as a result” to more accurately convey the intended meaning.

The essay uses a variety of complex structures. However, there are a few grammatical errors and awkward constructions. The essay uses a variety of sentence structures, which adds variety and interest to the writing. However, there are some grammatical errors that could be revised for clarity and accuracy. For example, the phrase “adding classes about metal health” should be “adding classes about mental health.” The essay also contains some minor errors in verb tense and agreement that could be revised for clarity and accuracy.

The essay addresses the task effectively, providing a clear position throughout. However, the essay could be improved by providing more specific examples to support the arguments. The essay clearly addresses the prompt by discussing the reasons for the difficulty many students face in focusing and paying attention at school and suggesting solutions to address these issues. The essay provides a clear introduction, body paragraphs that discuss each factor contributing to the lack of focus and attention, and potential solutions, and a conclusion that summarizes the main points. However, the essay could be improved by providing more specific examples to support the arguments. The essay provides a clear introduction, body paragraphs that discuss each factor contributing to the lack of focus and attention, and potential solutions, and a conclusion that summarizes the main points.