More and more people are choosing to eat healthy food and exercise regularly. Why? What can we do to encourage this?
The number of people eating healthily and doing regular exercise is on the rise. This
can be attributed to the growth of fitness influencers and rising costs of healthcare, and a number of steps can be taken to prompt more people to do the same.
There are two main contributors to a rise in the number of people adhering to a healthy lifestyle. One is the proliferation of self-care and health and fitness content on social networks. This can be explained by the very nature of the social media, which promotes high beauty standards and physical attractiveness, and the content creators on these platforms could be making videos and blogposts to help their followers achieve those standards, with their fans aspiring towards these standards, thus eating healthily and exercising regularly in that pursuit. Another, although not universal, reason could be a rise in the cost of healthcare. This is perhaps especially the case in the western world, in countries like the US, where the number one reason people go bankrupt is the failure to pay for medical bills. Given this knowledge, most people in such countries try to maintain a healthy lifestyle in order not to fall sick and face a considerable financial burden.
To encourage more people to exercise on a regular basis and eat in a healhy way, the
government should step in. One way they could achieve this goal is by constructing
more public sports facilities. Their mere presence could encourage people to go out and work out. My neighboorhood is a relevant case in point. After the construction of a track field, many members of my community started running in the morning and doing such exercises as yoga. As far as the diet of the general populace is concerned, I believe that there has to be educational campaigns on TV, which explain the importance of a balanced diet. Besides this, the government needs to ensure that school canteens sell healthy food options so that children have no access to products like chips or soda drinks or other harmful food options. When done on a national scale, these initiatives might prove effective.
To conclude, the influence of fitness media personalities and expensive medical care
could explain people’s increased tendency of following a healthy lifestyle. To involve
more people into this kind of lifestyle, the government needs to conduct educational
campaigns and build necessary facilities
The essay is logically organized and ideas are connected well. The introduction and conclusion are clear and relevant. However, there are a few instances where the flow of ideas could be improved.
Suggestions
- Try to use a wider range of linking words to connect your ideas more effectively.
- Ensure that your ideas flow smoothly from one to the next by using phrases that clearly indicate the relationship between sentences.
The essay uses a wide range of vocabulary and there is evidence of less common and idiomatic language. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choice.
The essay demonstrates a good control of a range of grammatical structures, with only minor errors. However, there are a few sentences that could be rephrased for better clarity.
The essay addresses the task effectively, providing a clear position throughout the response. The essay provides relevant, extended and supported ideas. However, the essay could be improved by providing more specific examples to support the arguments.
Suggestions
- Include more specific examples to support your arguments. In the second main body paragraph, you provide an example of your neighborhood, which is great. However, more specific details about the educational campaigns or the construction of sports facilities could further strengthen your argument.