Muslima KH JIS

The issue of whether universities should allow admission to all students regardless of their academic ability is a topic of substantial debate. There are both pros and cons to this approach that need to be carefully reflect on.In this essay we will discuss about it.
One of the main benifit of open admission policies is the make equality and fully in education.By letting students from different life circumstances and skill levels attend universities can help get rid of problems that make it hard for people to go to college.This can bring together a mix of students making learning better for everyone. They can share their own ideas and experiences which can help for everyone think in a new and creative ways.
Another advantage is that open admission can help students improve themselves. Some students who didn’t do well in high school might have faced problems like money issues or not getting enough help from teachers.By giving them a chance to go to university schools can help them learn important skills and gain knowledge for better opportunities. With extra help like teaching,giving advice these students can do well in their studies and feel more positive.
On the other hand there are drawbacks to this approach.One big worry is that the quality of education might go down. If universities accept too many students who are not ready it could result in more students dropping out or getting lower grades.
This could demage the university’s image and make its degrees less respected.
Also, having a lot students who are not fully prepared can use up the university’s resources. Teachers may need to spend extra time to helping students who are struggling which means they have less time to focus on more advanced classes.This can couse frustration (anger)for both teachers and students who want more challenging learning experiences.
In conclusion allowing all students into universities can provide equal opportunities but it might effect the quality of education. It’s important to balance being open to everyone while maintaining high standards.

6.5

The essay is logically organized and the progression of ideas is clear. However, there are some issues with the use of cohesive devices and the overall cohesion of the essay. The essay is well-structured, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. The use of transition words and phrases helps to guide the reader through the text. However, there are a few instances where the flow of ideas could be improved. For example, in the second body paragraph, the transition from the general benefits of open admissions to the specific advantages discussed could be smoother. Additionally, the conclusion could be more comprehensive, summarizing the main points discussed and reiterating the writer’s stance more clearly.

Suggestions

Try to use a wider range of cohesive devices to improve the flow of your ideas.
Ensure that your conclusion effectively summarizes the main points of your essay.

The essay demonstrates a good command of a broad lexical repertoire. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choice. The essay demonstrates a good command of a varied vocabulary, with appropriate use of academic language. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choice that could be revised for clarity. For example, in the first body paragraph, the phrase “fully in education” should be “fully in education,” and in the second body paragraph, the phrase “couse frustration” should be “cause frustration.”

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms and a variety of grammatical structures. However, there are a few grammatical errors and awkward constructions that can be distracting. The essay demonstrates a good command of grammar and sentence structure, with few errors. However, there are a few instances of awkward phrasing and grammatical errors that could be revised for clarity. For example, in the first body paragraph, the phrase “can help get rid of problems” could be rephrased as “can help address problems,” and in the second body paragraph, the phrase “do well in their studies and feel more positive” could be rephrased as “succeed in their studies and feel more positive.”

The essay addresses the task effectively, presenting a clear position throughout the response. However, the argument could be more fully developed and supported with specific examples. The essay effectively addresses the prompt, providing a clear position on the issue and supporting it with relevant arguments and examples. The introduction and conclusion are clear and concise, and the body paragraphs are well-structured, with each paragraph focusing on a single main idea. However, the essay could be improved by providing more specific examples to support the arguments. For example, in the first body paragraph, the example of students from different life circumstances and skill levels benefiting from open admissions could be further developed to provide more specific evidence.