Nowadays many people choose to be self-employed, rather than to work for a company or organization.Why might this be the case? What could be the disadvantages of being self-employed?

In today’s world, options are various in terms of working in preferable jobs. In this regard, many opt for mo being more self-employed than belonging to companies or organisations. Several factors force people to work in their own businesses and this has some drawbacks – having more responsibility and being isolated from society.
There might be some reasons why the majority of individuals prefer to be employed by their own in some work: running businesses,taxi drivers or freelance rather than official jobs. First and foremost, this development may be because of flexible working hours. To clarify, person who works in companies is particularly likely to face difficulties to have time for special events like wedding parties, birthdays and family gatherings. Unless individuals are employed by organisations, they can do any activity whenever they want. Taxi drivers can be clear example in this case, having participated in some events, they are able to carry on their tasks without issues.
Moreover, of all the people who worked in official jobs, many of them might have dropped off work owing to stable or little salary. Since, with the payment of companies, people may find covering expenses difficult and they choose to be self-employed although it requires more effort
Despite some positive sides of self-employment,it comes up with drawbacks as well. Firstly, increased responsibility is a main concern. Due to not having exact systems
or controlling, individuals have to do multiple tasks while running a personal business. It brings tiredness that leads people not to have concentration from time to time. To be more clear, having focused on tasks simultaneously , people may make a mistake in some parts including accounting, dealing with counterparts and others of job.
Additionally, isolation can be another issue of this statement. Thinking about risks of failure, work-life imbalance ,stress and pressure makes people be far from social interactions with their coworkers , friends and even family, causing loneliness.
To conclude, I think that people prefer to be self-employed because of some factors such as flexible working hours as well as lucrative income. Several disadvantages, however, should be taken into account.

6.5

The essay is logically organized and the progression of ideas is clear. However, there are some issues with the use of cohesive devices and the overall cohesion of the essay. The essay follows a logical structure, but the use of cohesive devices is sometimes inaccurate or missing, making the progression of ideas a bit difficult to follow. Additionally, the conclusion could be more effective in summarizing the main points and providing a clear final thought.

Suggestions

Use a variety of cohesive devices to ensure smooth transition between ideas.
Make sure to fully develop your ideas in each paragraph.

The essay uses a sufficient range of vocabulary and there is evidence of some less common and idiomatic language. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation. The essay demonstrates a good command of a wide range of vocabulary related to the topic of self-employment. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choices that could be revised for clarity and accuracy.

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms and there are some errors in grammar and punctuation. However, these do not generally impede communication. The essay uses a variety of sentence structures and shows a good command of grammar and punctuation. However, there are a few instances of incorrect verb forms and word endings that could be revised for clarity and accuracy.

The essay addresses the task effectively, providing a clear position throughout the response. The essay effectively addresses the prompt by discussing the reasons why people may choose to be self-employed and the potential disadvantages of this choice. The writer presents a clear introduction and conclusion, and the body paragraphs are well-organized and focused. However, the argument could be further developed with more specific examples and a deeper analysis of the implications of self-employment.