Nowadays, more and more people from different cities are spending more time away from their families. What are the possible reasons and the effects on the people themselves and their families?

In this modernized world, many people spend a significant amount of time away from their families.. The reasons for their actions vary, and I believe this change benefits both the individuals themselves and their families.
There are two main reasons for separation from their families. First of all, many people relocate for educational purposes which leads often to require them to live in different cities or even countries away from their families. In other words, in many countries, the teaching quality or facilities may poor, this , in turn , they may tend to study better educational institutions . For example, Uzbekistan , Tashkent, many students complained about their study in the field of medicine university due to not only lack of medical instruments but also, having inexperienced teachers. Subsequently, they moved to South Korea where one of the best medical universities have located. Moreover, the major cause may leads to career opportunities, including, job prospects, career advancement even if needs to spend their times far from their families.
I, however, subscribe to the idea that working or studying far from their relatives which can be brought many advantages both of them. This is because individuals to moving one place to another strange place without any kind of supports which can enhanced personal growth and independence. It provides opportunities to learn new skills and adapt to diverse environments and it leads to improve management of family before the marriage years .One another upside of living away from families is learn new culture. Living in a different country exposes to individuals to diverse new culture, languages and traditions. This exposures can foster cultural appreciation and tolerance as well as enrich the horizon.
To sum up, There are so many reasons for living without family in different city or country, I believe it is for the most part advantageous seeing as it has enhanced the self-realization and learn new cultural knowledge

6.5

The essay is logically organized and the progression of ideas is clear. However, there are some issues with the use of cohesive devices and the overall cohesion of the essay. The essay follows a logical structure, but the use of cohesive devices is sometimes inaccurate or missing, making the progression of ideas a bit difficult to follow. Additionally, the conclusion could be more effective in summarizing the main points and reiterating the stance taken in the introduction.

Suggestions

Use a variety of cohesive devices to ensure smooth transition between ideas.
Make sure to link all the ideas in a paragraph coherently.

The essay demonstrates a good command of a broad lexical resource. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choice. The essay demonstrates a good command of a broad lexical resource, with a variety of vocabulary used effectively. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choice that could be revised for clarity and accuracy.

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms and a variety of grammatical structures. However, there are several grammatical errors that can be distracting for the reader. The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, and the majority of sentences are free from grammatical errors. However, there are a few instances of incorrect verb forms and sentence structures that could be revised for clarity and accuracy.

The essay addresses the task effectively, providing a clear position throughout the response. The essay addresses the task effectively, providing a clear position and supporting it with relevant examples. However, the essay could be improved by providing a more thorough explanation of how the separation from family can lead to personal and cultural growth.