Nowadays young people are admiring media and sports stars, even though they do not set a good example. Do you think this is a positive or negative development
In today’s world, although media and athlete celebrities are failing to set a good example, they are widely admired by the younger generation. Although this development may bring about some positive changes, I share the view that it is generally a negative one.
Admittedly, deep admiration for famous media stars and athletes has some benefits. One key advantage is inspiration. Many of these well-known individuals can be a source of motivation. Many youngsters are encouraged by their idols because of their determination and hard work, which impresses upon children the notion that miracles can happen through perseverance. These kinds of role models provide a hint on how to pursue their goals, especially since many of them have come from poor backgrounds. A famous football player, Cristiano Ronaldo, is a good example of this idea. When he was a child, he did everything for survival, including sweeping streets or working as a waiter. However, his admiration for famous people and hard work led him to become one of the best players in the world. Additionally, these stars can motivate people to engage in different sports activities and maintain a healthy routine. Many individuals set beneficial daily routines to stay in shape, inspired by media and sports stars. For example, I personally watch videos of Habib Nurmagomedov, one of the most famous athletes globally. Because of his inspirational videos, I have adopted discipline in my own daily life, which has, in turn, led to a shift from a reckless lifestyle to a more active one.
Notwithstanding the points above, I strongly believe that being captivated by celebrity culture has some detrimental consequences that cannot be overlooked. One major drawback is the promotion of bad habits. Many famous individuals, after achieving fame and wealth, fall into destructive behaviors such as substance abuse, excessive drinking, or engaging in criminal activities, which are seen as negative cultural norms. For example, the famous singer and actor Elvis Presley is known for his unhealthy lifestyle, including substance abuse, which contributed to his early death. The curiosity of young people makes them interested in these habits, as they often look up to their idols. Another drawback of idolizing media and sports figures is the dissatisfaction it creates in young people. Many famous media stars and athletes achieve extraordinary results and social status at a very young age. For instance, the young football player Lamine Yamal, who is playing for Barcelona and achieving remarkable results at just 17 years old, serves as an example of this. Comparing themselves to such figures might lead to dissatisfaction among youngsters, especially if they are working hard but not achieving the same success. This can result in young people halting their career paths due to feelings of inadequacy.
In conclusion, while looking up to celebrities and athletes can be beneficial in some ways, such as motivating young people to follow their ambitions or form a healthy lifestyle, I believe that it can also lead to harmful habits and a lack of satisfaction with oneself. Therefore, this is generally a negative development.
The essay is logically organized and ideas are connected well. The introduction and conclusion are clear and relevant. However, there are a few areas where the flow of ideas could be improved.
Suggestions
- Try to use a wider range of linking words to connect your ideas.
- Ensure that your examples are directly relevant to the point you are making.
The essay uses a wide range of vocabulary and there is evidence of less common and idiomatic language. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choice.
The essay shows a good control of a range of grammatical structures, with only minor errors. However, there are a few sentences that could be rephrased for clarity.
The essay addresses the task effectively, presenting a clear position throughout. The arguments are well-developed and supported with relevant examples. However, the introduction could be more engaging and the conclusion could be more comprehensive.
Suggestions
- Consider revising the introduction to make it more engaging and to provide more context for the essay.
- Consider adding a few more sentences to the conclusion to make it more comprehensive.