Skip to main content

Question: Some people think that the best way to increase the quality of education is to increase teachers' salaries. Others believe that it is more important to improve the school facilities. Discuss both views and give your own opinion. You should write at least 250 words in response to this question, presenting arguments for both sides and concluding with your own perspective.

Same humans think that the correct way to improve the education is to rise teacher’s wage. Others believe that it is more important to make comfortable with new school facilities. Two views are extremely useful, while I prefer to improve the school facilities.
Everyone studies in school from young and then, went to study in university. As well as, some school facilities are extremely old and out of order today. Children went to study to have new facilities to offer. But whereas directors wrote applications about these issues, these issues still cannot be solved by government. They will have studied in formal and pretty rooms rightly. In addition, many children have achieved high scores about pugilism, swimming and other sport fields. Experts are declining day by day about academic fields. This shows it, there are no have full comfort to offer for study.
Teacher’s wage will be increased that still good idea, because each teacher spend more money for family. But teacher’s wage is increasing for only can useful to them, because students change relationship to teacher during to pass high classes. For instance, students may not listen teacher’s tips and attend the lessons. So, many students prefer to work from foreign countries, despite learning the academic knowledge. If school facilities will be improved, students might return interesting again to study. Government will have provided new facilities in school. Students will extremely happy and they might try to learn more important information in school.
In conclusion, I feel that two views are enough correct. But government must provide the modern facilities for students of bright future.

5.5

The essay is logically organized and the progression of ideas is clear. However, there are some issues with the use of cohesive devices and the overall cohesion of the essay. The essay follows a logical structure, but the use of cohesive devices is sometimes inaccurate or missing, making the connection between ideas less smooth. Additionally, the conclusion could be more effective in summarizing the main points and clearly stating the writer’s opinion.

Suggestions
  • Use a variety of cohesive devices to ensure smooth transition between ideas.
  • Make sure to fully develop your conclusion to effectively summarize the main points and clearly state your opinion.

The essay uses a sufficient range of vocabulary and there is evidence of less common and idiomatic language. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation. The essay demonstrates a reasonable range of vocabulary, but there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation that can be distracting. Additionally, the use of informal language (e.g., ‘pugilism’) is not appropriate for an academic essay.

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms and there are some errors in grammar and punctuation. However, these do not detract from the overall clarity of the writing. The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are some grammatical errors and punctuation mistakes that can affect the overall clarity of the writing. Proofreading is recommended to correct these errors.

The essay addresses the task and provides a clear position throughout the response. However, the development of the argument is not always clear and the use of examples is sometimes confusing. The essay addresses the topic by discussing both views and providing the writer’s opinion. However, the development of the argument could be clearer, and the use of examples could be more relevant and specific to support the main points.

Suggestions
  • Ensure that your argument is clearly developed and that your examples are relevant and specific to support your main points.