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There is a view that success hinges on serendipity. While there have been instances where luck dictated the path to success, entirely depending on this element in this regard equals significantly dismissing the chemistry of hard work and determination.
Taking a sneak peek at the discovery of America as a continent reveals so much about the importance of luck in achieving remarkable outcomes. Columbus, the man who accidentally found this previously-unknown land, had initially intended to sail towards India, most likely in the hope of establishing trade routs over the sea. Little did he realize that Columbus was actually headed to a new continent, which would further alter the entire course of human civilization as we know today. Such unexpected explorations as this one underscore the relevance of luck with respect to life success.
Despite these occasional events, however, the lion’s share of success lies in how industrious a person is. Cristiano Ronaldo – a celebrated football player – serves as a pre-eminent example. The Portuguese has shared the stage with another, albeit no less hardworking, athlete, Lionel Messi. While the latter football player has also remained relentless to realize his goals, the former one is an epitome of resilience and iron mindset. As he highlighted in one of his recent interviews with the press, “Talent without hard work is nothing”, words within which emerges a real ingredient of success. This reinforces the idea that becoming a successful in any chosen branch is the by-product of effort and time, without which groundbreaking breakthroughs are hardly ever feasible.
In conclusion, although serendipity plays its part in bringing certain achievements to light, completely attributing success to it would be a mistake on its own. At the end of the day, luck favors the prepared mind.
The essay is logically organized and ideas are connected well. The introduction and conclusion are clear and relevant. However, there are a few areas where the flow of ideas could be improved.
Suggestions
- Try to use a wider range of linking words to connect your ideas.
- Ensure that your examples are directly relevant to the point you are making.
The essay uses a wide range of vocabulary and there is evidence of less common and idiomatic language. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choice.
The essay shows a good control of a range of grammatical structures, with only minor errors. However, there are a few sentences that could be rephrased for clarity.
The essay addresses the task effectively, presenting a clear position throughout the response. The essay provides relevant, extended and supported ideas.
Suggestions
- Ensure that you fully develop all of your points. In some cases, you introduce an example but do not fully explain how it supports your argument.