Some countries have legal ages at which people can drink. Other believe not having strict laws is a better policy. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion
Countries have differing attitudes towards setting a specific legal age for drinking. In some corners of the world, people cannot drink before reaching a certain age, whereas in others, individuals advocate for not legislating strict rules regarding this matter. In my view, having an age limit is essential to prevent young people from ruining their lives both physically and mentally.
Proponents of not setting a legal age for the intake of alcoholic beverages cite various reasons to support their stance. The thrill of engaging in forbidden activities is the major one. It is in humans’ instinct nature to have an increased desire to do something that they have been banned from, because this ban increases their curiosity. This idea can be proven by looking at the prohibition era that took place in the USA. The government decided to impose a serious ban on the sale and consumption of all alcoholic beverages in the early years of 19th century as a response to the growing cases of domestic violence and child abuse. Little did they know that this initiative, counteractively, caused a rise in the consumption of alcohol among citizens. Therefore, having a legal age of drinking might not be a good idea.
Despite this, I still support setting a required age for drinking alcohol legally. The main reason for my stance is that without this law, young people might drink too frequently, eventually suffering from addiction. Adults make rational decisions by analyzing the pros and cons of their actions, because they are fully aware that they will have to cope with the consequences. In case of drinking, for instance, most adults drink alcoholic beverages on certain occasions like weekends,holidays, birthday parties or weddings. By contrast, youngsters tend to be under social influence and peer pressure, meaning if their friends start a habit of drinking alcohol at an early age, they will have to face the dilemma of following friends or being left out of a social circle. In most situations, they opt for the latter one, as the need for acceptance is stronger.
Aside from the problems related to addiction, a heavy toll that alcohol takes on youngsters’ health is another factor. Alcohol, when consumed in excess and over an extended duration, is known to cause a serious damage to several vital organs in human body, such as heart, liver, and kidneys. Considering the fact that many people these days act in accordance with laws rather than societal norms, it is safe to assume that the only thing preventing the majority of young individuals from drinking is the existence of legal age. This means that not having it will result in an increased consumption of alcoholic beverages among young people, leaving them vulnerable to aforementioned diseases and ultimately putting a strain on public health.
To conclude, the absence of an age limit for alcohol intake might bring about negative consequences, such as health issues and addiction, which is why I remain convinced that the establishment of a specific legal age is absolutely necessary despite the lure of forbidden activities.
The essay is logically organized and ideas are connected well. The introduction and conclusion are clear and relevant. However, there are a few instances where the flow of ideas could be improved.
Suggestions
- Try to use a wider range of linking words to connect your ideas.
- Ensure that your examples are directly relevant to the point you are making.
The essay uses a wide range of vocabulary and there is evidence of less common and idiomatic language. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choice.
The essay uses a wide range of complex structures. There are a few minor errors, but they do not impede communication.
The essay addresses the task effectively, presenting a clear position throughout. The arguments are well-developed and supported with relevant examples. However, the introduction could be more concise and focused.
Suggestions
- Consider revising the introduction to make your position clear more quickly.
- Consider revising the introduction to make your position clear more quickly.