Some ex-prisoners commit crimes after being released from prison. What do you think is the cause? How can it be solved?
It has been universally accepted that problem of some ex-prisoners commit crimes after being released from prison is escalating at an alarming rate. The problem is bringing a state of depression among the masses and in economy too. There are plethora of reasons of the same and its possible solutions can be suggested too which are discussed as follows.
In regards to the problem, the major reason which can be stated is no one wants to hire someone out of prison, so the people out of prison are suffering from unemployment then commits a crime. In support to this reason, a fact known is a person who has been in prison for a long time adapts to the environment and becomes a criminal again due to the environment. Another problematic cause is they are under pressure in prison and then they become depressed when looking for work.
Seeing the problem with a brighter mind, many of solutions can be helpful to curb this menace. One if the solution is the rights of those who have been released from prison and those who have not been imprisoned should not be separated. Secondly, it is necessary to improve the prison environment and explain that life is not over. Lastly, after leaving prison, he should be connected with a psychologist and the neighborhood should help him find a job.
To conclude, solving a global issue is not easy but with the joint efforts of the people, a control can be taken over the problem with the aforementioned suggested measures. I believe that everyone should come forward to mitigate this problem.
The essay is logically organized and the progression of ideas is clear. However, there are some issues with the use of cohesive devices and the overall cohesion of the essay. The essay follows a logical structure, but the use of cohesive devices is sometimes inaccurate or missing, making the progression of ideas a bit difficult to follow. Additionally, the conclusion could be more effective in summarizing the main points and providing a clear final thought.
Suggestions
- Use a variety of cohesive devices to ensure smooth transition between ideas.
- Make sure to fully develop your conclusion to effectively summarize the main points and provide a clear final thought.
The essay uses a sufficient range of vocabulary and there is evidence of some less common and idiomatic language. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation. The essay demonstrates a good command of a wide range of vocabulary related to the topic, with some less common and idiomatic language. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choices that could be revised for clarity and accuracy.
The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms and there are some errors in grammar, punctuation and spelling. The essay demonstrates a good control of a range of grammatical structures, with some flexibility in use. However, there are a few errors in grammar, punctuation, and spelling that can be distracting and may need to be revised for clarity. Additionally, the use of more complex sentence structures could be increased to demonstrate a higher level of grammatical proficiency.
The essay addresses the task effectively, providing a clear position throughout the response. The essay effectively addresses the prompt by discussing the reasons some ex-prisoners may commit crimes after being released and suggesting potential solutions. The writer presents a clear explanation of the factors contributing to this issue and proposes several potential solutions, demonstrating a good understanding of the topic. However, the essay could be improved by providing more specific examples to support the arguments and by offering a more detailed analysis of the proposed solutions.
Suggestions
- Provide more specific examples to support your arguments.
- Offer a more detailed analysis of the proposed solutions.