Some people argue job satisfaction is more important than job security. Others believe a permanent job is more important. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion
Choosing a job is not an easy decision as it involves various factors. While job security is claimed to be of greater importance, others argue that it is job satisfaction that needs to be prioritized. I think to have a successful career requires a careful consideration of multiple facets of a job.
In light of current economic climate, it is crucial to ensure a long-term employment. Given that the world population grows, the competitive nature of employment in every sector becomes more intense. As a result, if an individual loses their job, they have to wait for prolonged period until another available job is found. This may lead to financial pressure for an ordinary person who needs to pay for rising costs of basic needs. Therefore, some maintain that job security should be considered more seriously than job security.
Conversely, there are adverse implications of overlooking job security. Routinely engaging in an activity that provides no satisfaction may cause fatigue, mental pressure, or depression. To avoid such mental constraints derived from work, an individual should envisage how rewarding their career options need to be. Having to deal with toxic colleagues, for example, can cause anxiety that may cripple into our personal space. For this reason, there is a school of thought that job satisfaction is a more important aspect in choosing a career path.
In conclusion, opinions vary as to which aspect of a job should be prioritized: job security or satisfaction. Personally, I believe both factors play a key role in leading a successful professional life, and ignoring either of these may lead to undesirable consequences.
The essay is logically organized and ideas are connected well. The introduction and conclusion are clear and relevant. However, there are a few areas where the flow of ideas could be improved.
Suggestions
- Try to use a wider range of linking words to connect your ideas.
- Ensure that your ideas are fully developed and explained.
The essay uses a wide range of vocabulary and there is evidence of less common and idiomatic language. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choice.
The essay uses a wide range of complex structures. There are a few minor errors, but they do not impede communication.
The essay addresses the task fully and presents a well-developed response with relevant, extended and supported ideas. However, the argument could be more balanced in places, with more focus on job satisfaction in the second half of the essay.
Suggestions
- Consider revising the second half of the essay to provide a more balanced argument.