Some people argue that parents should have a strong influence on their children’s choice of friends and life partners. Others believe that young people should make these decisions independently. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
In our modern world, some people have different views about a strong influence on their children’s choice of friends and life partners, while others believe that young people should make these decisions independently.
On the one hand, many parents can help their childrens choice of friends and life partners, and parents always want to close friends for their children. In fact, psychologists found that parents can feel false friends and wrong life partners. In addition, parents should have a strong influence on their children’s wrong choice. From my perspective, young people may be choice false friends in their life’s if parents don’t help to choose true friends. Moreover, psychologists say 25 percent of children choose false friends while the remaining percentage of children select true friends. In one word, parents are always important from children’s choices.
On the other hand, some people believe that young people should make these decisions independently. The reason for this young people can choose true friends and life partners if parents don’t agree with their children’s choice. In addition, this way is not greater than the other way. In my opinion, young people can’t choose true friends and life partners if their parents don’t agree with this work . Moreover, young people should make these decisions independently if their mentality high because mentality has many beneficial things for all negative works. But the mentality of all young people is not developed until the age of 13. So that’s why parents are absolutely important to their children’s choices.
In conclusion, parents should have a strong influence on their children’s choice of close friends and life parents than the children’s own decisions.
The essay is logically organized and the progression of ideas is clear. However, there are some issues with the use of cohesive devices and the overall cohesion of the essay. The essay follows a logical structure, but the use of cohesive devices is sometimes inaccurate or missing, making the argument difficult to follow. Additionally, there are some issues with coherence, as the connection between ideas can be unclear. More explicit signposting language could help to improve the overall cohesion and coherence of the essay.
Suggestions
- Use a variety of cohesive devices to ensure smooth transition between ideas.
- Make sure to use cohesive devices within and between paragraphs.
The essay uses a sufficient range of vocabulary and there is evidence of some less common and idiomatic language. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation. The essay demonstrates a reasonable range of vocabulary, with some attempts to use less common and idiomatic language. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation that can be distracting. Additionally, the use of synonyms could be improved to avoid repetition and enhance the overall lexical resource.
The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms and there are some errors in grammar, punctuation and spelling. The essay uses a variety of complex and simple sentence structures, but there are some grammatical errors that can affect the overall clarity. Punctuation and spelling are generally accurate, but there are a few errors that do not significantly impact the readability of the essay. Proofreading for grammatical errors and ensuring consistent punctuation and spelling will help to improve the overall quality of the writing.
The essay addresses the task and presents a clear position throughout the response. However, the argument could be more fully developed and supported. The essay addresses the topic by discussing both views on the influence of parents on children’s choice of friends and life partners. However, the argument could be more fully developed, as the essay tends to repeat the same points rather than introducing new arguments or providing further support for the existing ones. Additionally, the conclusion could be more substantial, as it simply restates the opinion of the writer rather than providing a deeper analysis of the topic.
Suggestions
- Provide more specific examples to support your arguments.
- Ensure that each paragraph introduces a new point and develops it fully before moving on to the next point.