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Some people believe that teenagers should concentrate on all school subjects equally. Others believe that teenagers should focus on the subjects that they are best at or that they find the most interesting. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some believe that students should give equal attention to all school subjects, while others argue that focusing on chosen subjects is more beneficial. While both approaches have their advantages, this essay discusses each view before presenting my opinion.
On the one hand, concentrating on all subjects at school is essential, as it prepares students to overcome potential challenges in securing a decent job. A well-structured education enables students to master key fields that drive the nation’s economy, such as medicine, engineering, and law. For instance, doctors are in high demand worldwide due to the prevalence of critical health issues, like cancer and diabetes, making medicine one of the highest-paid professions. If students develop a strong foundation in subjects like biology and chemistry during school and later pursue them at university, they not only have the opportunity to become well-paid professionals but also to help the society as a whole. By diagnosing and treating patients through medical screenings and treatments, they can positively impact countless lives, becoming both financially secure and socially admired.
On the other hand, learning all school subjects simultaneously can be both physically and mentally demanding, leading to increased stress levels and exhaustion. Focusing on subjects that students are good at or interested in, however, can be time-saving, less overwhelming, and adopted by most students. When students focus on the areas that they are naturally skilled and passionate about, they are expected to stay motivated and engaged. This enthusiasm leads to a deep understanding of the subject matter and a willingness to devote time and effort, leading to better academic performance among students. Furthermore, pursuing areas of their interests can lead to both personal and professional growth. This passion and admiration towards the subject can pave the way for career advancements. They are more likely to choose fulfilling careers that align with their skills and passions, ensuring long-term satisfaction and happiness in life. For instance, a student passionate about art may excel if they focus solely on creative subjects, allowing them to build a career as an artist or designer, rather than dividing their attention across unrelated fields.
In my opinion, both approaches have their own advantages, but the choice depends on individual preferences. Students who prioritize broad academic exposure and financial security may benefit from studying all subjects, as this equips them with versatile skills for high-demand careers. However, for those putting satisfaction over materialistic matters, pursuing specific subjects that align with students’ interests may be more advantageous. Personally, I believe focusing only on chosen subjects is better for maintaining everything engaging and motivating.
In conclusion, while learning all subjects can help students secure in-demand professions and financial independence, focusing on specific subjects allows them to pursue fulfilling careers aligned with their passions. Ultimately, the choice depends on individual goals and priorities, but I believe focusing on selected subjects ensures long-term motivation and satisfaction.

8.0

The essay is logically organized and ideas are connected well. The introduction and conclusion are clear and relevant. However, there are a few instances where the flow of ideas could be improved.

“On the one hand, concentrating on all subjects at school is essential” – This sentence introduces a new paragraph and idea.

“On the other hand, learning all school subjects simultaneously can be both physically and mentally demanding” – This sentence is a bit long and could be broken up for clarity.

Suggestions
  • Try to use a wider range of linking words to connect your ideas more effectively.
  • Consider breaking up long sentences to improve clarity.

The essay uses a wide range of vocabulary and there is evidence of less common and idiomatic language. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choice.

“A well-structured education enables students to master key fields” – The term “key fields” may not be the most appropriate in this context.

“This enthusiasm leads to a deep understanding of the subject matter” – The term “subject matter” is a bit formal and could be replaced with “topics” for clarity.

The essay demonstrates a wide range of complex structures. However, there are a few minor errors.

“They are more likely to choose fulfilling careers that align with their skills and passions” – The term “they are more likely to choose” is a bit awkward.

“Personally, I believe focusing only on chosen subjects is better for maintaining everything engaging and motivating” – The term “maintaining everything engaging and motivating” is a bit awkward and vague.

The essay addresses the task effectively, presenting a clear position throughout. Both sides of the argument are discussed in detail, and the writer’s opinion is clearly stated. However, the essay could be improved by providing more specific examples to support the arguments. The essay provides general examples, such as doctors and artists. Including more specific examples from different fields or cultural contexts could make the arguments more compelling. The essay could be improved by providing more specific examples to support the arguments.

Suggestions
  • Consider providing more specific examples to support your arguments.