Some people believe that the government should spend more money putting in more works of art like paintings and statues in cities to make them better places to live in. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Some people argue that the government should allocate more funds to the creation of public art, such as sculptures and paintings in cities to improve their livability. Nevertheless, I believe that the government should prioritize other areas to enhance the overall quality of life for residents.
On the one hand, the addition of art in public spaces can significantly make a city more appealing. For example, statues and paintings can transform dull, empty spaces into vibrant areas that people enjoy visiting. For example, cities such as Berlin and Melbourne are well-known for their extensive street art, which not only contributes to a spectacular view but also attracts tourists and stimulates local economy. Moreover, art plays important role on people’s well-being by adding beauty to their surroundings and fostering creativity.
On the other hand, while art undoubtedly enhances the environment, it should not be the government’s primary focus when it comes to spending. There are other critical areas that require urgent attention, such as transportation infrastructure and affordable housing. In many cities, public transport systems are overcrowded and inefficient, and there is a pressing need for better housing options for low-income residents. These fundamental issues have a direct impact on the daily lives of citizens and should be prioritized to ensure a higher standard of living.
In conclusion, although public art undeniably enhances the visual appeal of a city and attracts more visitors, it should not be the primary focus of government spending. Investing in infrastructure, healthcare, and housing is more important for creating a high quality of life for residents.
The essay is logically organized and ideas are connected well. The introduction and conclusion are clear and relevant. However, there are a few areas where the flow of ideas could be improved.
Suggestions
- Try to use a wider range of linking words to connect your ideas.
- Ensure that your arguments are fully developed in each paragraph.
The essay uses a wide range of vocabulary and there is evidence of less common and idiomatic language. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choice.
The essay uses a wide range of complex structures. There are a few minor errors, but they do not impede communication.
The essay addresses the task fully and presents a well-developed response. The writer’s position is clear throughout the essay. However, the argument could be more fully developed in places.
Suggestions
- Try to provide more specific examples to support your arguments.
- Ensure that each paragraph fully develops a single idea.