Some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. Other people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Nowadays many individuals believe that advertising is one of the successful way to make us for buying things , while another group of people say that its quite simple and we do not have to focus on it . I think both of those views are equal.
For starting point currently advertising is developing rapidly day by day. It can help not only for rising companys’ budget with selling products fleetly , but it can also provide employees with high amount of salary. For example , “Pepsi” beverage corporation was not common among the world in 1970 years. But now consequence of advertisement it has developed and got more profit than past times .
Secondly, it is also true that, currently more people do not have free time to watch advertisements on their phones in tv Furthermore, when people are watching series or movies , they may fell boredom and nervous , if there would be advertisements . As an example , my coursemates are really bad-tempered cause of advertisements which are in the movies , and it affects to other people .
Another main points is that products may be fake . Online shopping has increased in recent years , thus to many individuals are booking items from it . As a result , when that product will come up , it may not be similar as announcements .
In conclusion , a lot of inhabitants trust that announcing is one of the main factor to make us to buy items frequently from online shoppings , whereas , some humans argue that , that is not as developed as people’s are saying , and most of those people will not focus on these kinda adverts now . I am guessing both sides are equalize for both individuals.
The essay is logically organized and the progression of ideas is clear. However, there are some issues with the use of cohesive devices and the overall cohesion of the essay. The essay is structured with an introduction, body paragraphs for each view, and a conclusion. However, the use of cohesive devices is sometimes awkward, affecting readability. Additionally, the sentence structure in the body paragraphs could be simplified for better understanding.
Suggestions
- Try to use a variety of cohesive devices to improve the flow of your writing.
- Make sure that each paragraph focuses on a single main idea.
The essay uses a mix of simple and complex vocabulary, but there are some inaccuracies and awkward phrases. The essay demonstrates a reasonable range of vocabulary, with attempts to use more complex language. However, there are some inaccuracies and awkward phrases that could be improved. Additionally, the use of synonyms could be increased to avoid repetition.
The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are some grammatical errors and inaccuracies. The essay attempts to use a range of grammatical structures, but there are several errors that affect clarity. In particular, the use of articles and prepositions is sometimes inaccurate. Additionally, the use of passive voice could be increased to add variety to the writing.
The essay addresses the task and presents a clear position throughout the response. However, the argument could be more fully developed and supported. The essay addresses the prompt by discussing two views on the effectiveness of advertising and providing the writer’s opinion. However, the discussion could be more balanced, with each view more clearly developed. Additionally, the writer’s opinion could be stated more clearly.
Suggestions
- Make sure to fully develop your arguments and support them with relevant examples.
- Consider providing a more detailed explanation of how advertising influences consumer behavior.