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Some people think most crimes are the result of circumstances like poverty and other social problems. Others believe that they are caused by people who are bad in nature. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

It is often argued that most crimes are the result of social circumstances, live poverty. While some people think that social problems are the main reason of crimes , others argue that criminals will commit crime regardless of their status. Low-social status could be the driving factor of why some individuals commit crimes. However, there has been cases in which convicts did a crime even if they had high-social status.
People who were born in slums often struggle with hierarchy in society. And that tension may lead to the illegal actions . Due to the fact that poverty often leads to unemployment, stealing can be needed action. Even though, stealing is just a minor crime, more severe ones also can take place in these ares.
On the other hand, there are many types of crimes that people with poor financial state cannot commit. For instance, corruption that is considered as one of the most widespread crimes, are commited by high status people. Some people believe that crimes are caused by people who are bad in nature. And that may be the reason why people regardless of their status commit crimes.
As I see it, people from low social status will always commit crimes and be punished for that, but what about political figures who actually so much worse than that? I believe the main reason of why some commit crimes is the lack of proper parental raise. Because it is always parents who we look up to since we are born. And their their attitude towards us shape our personality.
In conclusion, social problems can lead to crimes, but if, person is from well family, we can’t consider social problems as the main reason for committing the crimes

6.5

The essay is logically organized and the progression of ideas is clear. However, there are some issues with the use of cohesive devices and the overall cohesion of the essay. The essay follows a logical structure, but the use of cohesive devices is sometimes inaccurate or missing, making the connection between ideas less smooth. Additionally, the conclusion could be more effective in summarizing the main points and clearly stating the writer’s opinion.

Suggestions
  • Use a variety of cohesive devices to ensure smooth transition between ideas.
  • Make sure to fully develop your ideas in each paragraph.

The essay uses a sufficient range of vocabulary and there is evidence of less common and idiomatic language. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation. The essay demonstrates a good command of a wide range of vocabulary related to the topic, with some less common and idiomatic language. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choices, which could be revised for clarity and accuracy.

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms and there are few grammatical errors. However, there are some errors in article and preposition usage, as well as some issues with sentence structure. The essay uses a variety of complex structures, but there are a few grammatical errors and awkward constructions that could be revised for clarity and accuracy. Additionally, the essay would benefit from a more varied sentence structure to demonstrate a higher level of grammatical control.

The essay addresses the task and presents a clear position throughout the response. However, the argument could be more fully developed and supported with specific examples. The essay addresses the topic by discussing both views and providing the writer’s opinion. However, the argument could be more fully developed, and the essay would benefit from more specific examples to support the points made.

Suggestions
  • Ensure that you fully develop your arguments and support them with specific examples.