Some people think technology development decreases crime, while others believe it actually encourages crime. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
People have different views about how does technology affect crime. While some argue that technological advancement reduce crime , I side with those who believe that it provides criminals with new ideas to commit offenses.
Those who support technology can affect positively of reducing criminality cite several reasons for this. Firstly, technology advancements have lots of investigation. For example cameras which is stable on the roads, CCTV networks and others. In other words cities equipped with CCTV has witnessed significant reduction in street crimes like theft. This ways allow to monitor criminal activities more effectivelly. Another important consideration is technology plays in critical role in forensic science and solve the crimes. For instance , DNA analysis can help to solve cold cases and convict criminals who might otherwise have gone free.
However, I would argue that technological advancement can give to offenders new avenues for criminal activities. First and foremost, cybercrime has emerged as a major global issue. It exploit sensitive information of stealing even distrupting critical infrastructure. Furthermore technology has made traditional crimes more sophisticated. For example, criminals use encrypted communication tools to avoid detection and employ advanced gadgets to bypass security systems.
In conclusion, although technology can decrease crime throught improved observation and exploration it also enables new forms of criminal activities.
The essay is logically organized and the progression of ideas is clear. However, there are some issues with the use of cohesive devices and the overall cohesion of the essay. The essay follows a logical structure, but the use of cohesive devices is sometimes inaccurate or missing, making the connection between ideas less smooth. Additionally, the conclusion could be more effective in summarizing the main points and clearly stating the writer’s opinion.
Suggestions
- Use a variety of cohesive devices to ensure smooth transition between ideas.
- Make sure to fully develop your ideas in each paragraph.
The essay uses a sufficient range of vocabulary and there is evidence of some less common and idiomatic language. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation. The essay demonstrates a good command of a wide range of vocabulary related to the topic, with some less common and idiomatic language. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choices that could be revised for clarity and accuracy.
The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, and there are some errors in grammar and punctuation. However, these do not detract from the overall clarity of the writing. The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, and the majority of sentences are free from grammatical errors. However, there are a few instances of incorrect verb forms and sentence structures that could be revised for clarity and accuracy.
The essay addresses the task and presents a clear position throughout the response. However, the argument could be more fully developed and supported with specific examples. The essay addresses the task and presents a clear position throughout the response. However, the argument could be more fully developed, and the examples provided could be more specific and detailed to strengthen the argument. Additionally, the conclusion could be more comprehensive in summarizing the main points and clearly restating the writer’s opinion.
Suggestions
- Ensure that you fully develop your argument and support it with specific examples.
- Provide a more comprehensive conclusion that summarizes the main points and clearly restates your opinion.