Some people think technology development decreases crime, while others believe thatit actuallyencourages crime
Many people belive that technology improvement reduces crime while others think it is she way of increasing crime degree.Personally I side with the former as progrees in technology has a positive impact on the world’s crime scene.
On the one hand, both ideas have reasons.I think technology is more essantial role eveyone lives.Many people think is reduced the crime but other people think that increase crime.I think technologu improvement really encourages the crimes.Moreover,thy says the better information to each other.Nowaday,I think hackers can to a lot of shopleafting or other stealling easily.
One the other hand,I believe technology improvement reduces crime because nowadays security cameras recorded everythink and that helps for police to catch the criminals.Furthermore,mobike phone it is bery benefical.Because peoole had dangerous accident when they were call for help.
In my opinion,many countries should strong the technology and release new technology.
To conclude, although there are sound arguments as to why technology improvement can crimes.I think thay in reality it can help criminal activities
JO’RAYEVA SEVINCH
The essay is somewhat logically organized, but the progression of ideas is not always clear. There are some issues with cohesion, as some sentences do not connect well with each other, and there are some abrupt transitions between ideas. The essay also has issues with coherence, as the relationship between ideas can be confusing. The use of cohesive devices is somewhat inconsistent, which affects the overall flow of the essay. Additionally, the conclusion could be more effective in summarizing the main points and providing a clear final thought.
Suggestions
- Use a variety of cohesive devices to ensure smooth transitions between ideas.
- Make sure that each paragraph has a clear central idea and that all sentences in the paragraph support this idea.
The essay uses a mix of simple and complex vocabulary, but there are some inaccuracies and awkward phrases. The essay uses a mix of simple and complex vocabulary, but there are some inaccuracies and awkward phrases. Some words are used incorrectly, which can make the meaning unclear. There are also some issues with word form and spelling, which can detract from the overall clarity and effectiveness of the writing. Additionally, the essay could benefit from a wider range of vocabulary to more effectively convey the nuances of the argument.
The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are some grammatical errors and inaccuracies. The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are some grammatical errors and inaccuracies. Some sentences are awkwardly constructed and can be difficult to understand. There are also issues with verb tense, subject-verb agreement, and preposition use, which can detract from the overall clarity and effectiveness of the writing. Additionally, the essay could benefit from a more varied sentence structure to more effectively convey the nuances of the argument.
The essay addresses the task and presents a clear position throughout the response. However, the argument could be more fully developed and supported. The essay addresses the topic by presenting two contrasting views on the impact of technological advancements on crime. However, the introduction and conclusion could be more fully developed to provide a clearer stance on the issue. Additionally, the essay could provide more specific examples to support the arguments made.
Suggestions
- Provide more specific examples to support the arguments.
- Ensure that the introduction and conclusion are fully developed and provide a clear stance on the issue.