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Some people think that adverts control what we purchase, while others think they are useful sources of information on products. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

There is a debate over how advertisements impact humans’ lives, with some saying they manipulate most people’s decisions and others arguing that ads can lead to unknown characteristics of the product consumers needed. Some ads indeed serve as surprisingly useful source of information, however, I think the increasing amount of them pique the viewers’ interests, so that they want to buy the advertised goods.
Nowadays, people’s life revolves around the endless amount of information. This is happening because their lifestyle is constantly connected with global network -called the internet. On the top of that, more and more hours, people are spending on the social media platforms and slowly losing their ability to concentrate. Therefore, why advertisements could be lifebuoys, being postered everywhere outdoor and appearing at almost every site we search for, they grab viewer’s attention and could remind or guide helpful information.
This do happen, and with a help of ads, people have bumped into, they are finding products, work applications, educational resources, and other information they were looking for. But such occasions account a negligible amount, I believe, because world’s marketing have turned adverts into psychological tool, in order to increase the selling of their goods. Companies hire experts from psychology field to construct methods to predict consumers behavior and target them on their products. Moreover, famous celebrities make deals with companies and broadcast their good though different medias and people unconsciously follow their instructions. These movements create brands with high selling figures.
In conclusion, advertisements do help people find data they were looking for, but nowadays ads predominantly became suppliers tool, who found ways to control their clients purchases.

6.5

The essay is logically organized and the progression of ideas is clear. However, there are some areas where the flow of ideas could be improved. The essay follows a logical structure, but the connection between some ideas and paragraphs could be enhanced. The introduction sets up the topic well, but the transition to the body paragraphs is a bit abrupt. Clearer topic sentences and more explicit transitions would help guide the reader through the essay. Additionally, the conclusion could be more comprehensive, summarizing the main points and clearly stating the writer’s opinion.

Suggestions
  • Try to use a wider range of linking words to connect your ideas more effectively.
  • Ensure that your conclusion effectively summarizes the main points and clearly states your opinion.

The essay uses a wide range of vocabulary and there is evidence of less common and idiomatic language. However, there are some instances of awkward or incorrect word choice. The essay demonstrates a good command of a wide range of vocabulary, but there are some instances of awkward or incorrect word choice. For example, “This do happen, and with a help of ads, people have bumped into, they are finding products, work applications, educational resources, and other information they were looking for” is awkward and could be rephrased for clarity. Additionally, the use of more precise and varied language could help to convey the arguments more effectively.

The essay uses a variety of complex structures. However, there are some grammatical errors and awkward constructions. The essay uses a variety of sentence structures, which adds variety and interest. However, there are some grammatical errors that can be distracting, such as “This do happen” instead of “This happens” and “they are finding products, work applications, educational resources, and other information they were looking for” which could be more concisely phrased. Proofreading for these errors and focusing on sentence variety could help to improve the overall quality of the writing.

The essay addresses the task and presents a clear position throughout the response. However, the argument could be more fully developed and supported. The essay addresses the topic by discussing the two perspectives on the impact of advertisements. The writer presents a clear opinion that advertisements primarily act as tools to control consumer purchases rather than providing useful information. The introduction and conclusion are clear and relevant to the topic. However, the body paragraphs could be more focused and developed, with more specific examples to support the arguments. The essay would benefit from a more formal tone and style, as some expressions are quite informal and may not be appropriate for an academic essay.

Suggestions
  • Try to develop your arguments more fully and provide more specific examples to support your points.
  • Ensure that your writing is in a formal tone and style.