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Some people think that children should begin their formal education at a very early age. Other think they should begin after 7 years of age. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Starting formal education is debatable topic nowadays. Some individuals think that children shoud begin their formal education as early as possible while others believ that they should begin at 7 or later. I think going to school from a young agw will help children.
Delayed education offers a number of benefits to children enabling them to enjoy an extended period of childhood . Children can involve in unstructured play which aids to develop their creativity and problem solving skills. Furthermore,postponing education until aligns family bonds.
To be more specific, relationshipa between children and their parents, siblings are strengthens during early years as they mostly spend time together.
However,there are numerous individuals who approve of positive sides of early schooling. Academic and school readiness can exllain this stance as early education often help children to be prepared for engaging in formal learning activities like reading and writing as well as being emotional and physical ready.
In my view,it is reasonbale to take advantages of early formal education as it improves social skills and play based learning. For instance,activities which focus on educating children urge them to play and communicate each other. They not only play games ,but learn how to interact with peers.
In summary, delayed schooling can have benefits, I think it is more advantageous to start formal education earlier.

6.0

The essay is logically organized and the progression of ideas is clear. However, there are some issues with the use of cohesive devices and the overall cohesion of the essay. The essay follows a logical structure, but the use of cohesive devices is sometimes inaccurate or missing, making the progression of ideas a bit difficult to follow. Additionally, the conclusion could be more effective in summarizing the main points and clearly stating the writer’s opinion.

Suggestions
  • Use a variety of cohesive devices to ensure smooth transition between ideas.
  • Make sure to fully develop your conclusion to effectively summarize the main points and clearly state your opinion.

The essay uses a sufficient range of vocabulary and there is evidence of some less common and idiomatic language. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation. The essay demonstrates a good command of a wide range of vocabulary related to the topic, with some less common and idiomatic language. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choices that could be revised for clarity. Additionally, the use of more varied and precise language could help to strengthen the argument.

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms and there are some errors in grammar, punctuation and spelling. However, these errors do not generally impede communication. The essay uses a variety of sentence structures and shows a good control of grammar and punctuation. However, there are some errors in verb tense, subject-verb agreement, and sentence structure that can be distracting. Proofreading is recommended to correct these errors and improve the overall quality of the writing.

The essay addresses the task and presents a clear position throughout the response. However, the argument could be more fully developed and supported with specific examples. The essay addresses the topic by discussing both views and providing the writer’s opinion. However, the argument could be more fully developed, and the essay could provide more specific examples to support the points made. Additionally, the conclusion could be more effective in summarizing the main points and clearly stating the writer’s opinion.

Suggestions
  • Ensure that you fully develop your argument and support it with specific examples.
  • Make sure that your conclusion effectively summarizes the main points and clearly states your opinion.