Some people think that children should grow up in the countryside than a big city Do you agree or disagree?
Some people believe that is it better for children to be raised in a rural areas rather than in large cities.I complately agree with this statement because this area has clean air and natural surroundings and comunity closenes and cultural values.
First of all living in the countryside is relly comfortable for children.In countryside children breath fresh air and they spent more time in the nature.Countributing to their health development.When you living in the city makes a big influence for their health.The fresh air in the countryside has a signaficant impact on children’s health.For example,my elder sister living in the city with my grandparents since her childhood.Nowadays she is living with men.Amd I sense she gets stressed very easily because she grew up in the hustle and bustle of the city life.
Another profit of living in the village is children are closer to comunity life.We know that all people who living in the village very kind and with each other .All people know each other.Traditional values helping them to develop social skills.People in the cities are kind to each other.For example,my aunt live in the city centre.His children do not know other neighbours.
In conclusion,I agree that idea. Because living in the rural areas is develop their health and they will be approacheble in communication with people.
The essay is logically organized and the progression of ideas is clear. However, there are some issues with the use of cohesive devices and the overall cohesion of the essay. The essay follows a basic structure, but the use of cohesive devices is sometimes inaccurate or missing, making the progression of ideas a bit difficult to follow. Additionally, there are some issues with coherence, as the connection between ideas can be unclear. More effective use of cohesive devices and a clearer connection between ideas would improve the overall coherence of the essay.
Suggestions
- Use a variety of cohesive devices to ensure smooth transition between ideas.
- Make sure that each paragraph has a clear central topic and that all sentences in the paragraph relate to this topic.
The essay uses a sufficient range of vocabulary and there is evidence of some less common and idiomatic language. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and spelling. The essay demonstrates a reasonable range of vocabulary, with some attempts to use less common and idiomatic language. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and spelling that can be distracting. More accurate and varied vocabulary, as well as careful attention to spelling, would improve the overall quality of the essay.
The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms and there are some errors in grammar and punctuation. However, these errors do not generally impede communication. The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms and there are some grammatical errors and punctuation issues. However, these errors do not generally impede communication. More attention to grammatical accuracy and proper punctuation would improve the overall quality of the essay.
The essay addresses the task and presents a clear position throughout the response. However, the argument could be more fully developed and supported with specific examples. The essay addresses the task and presents a clear position throughout the response. However, the argument could be more fully developed, and the support provided is sometimes vague or unclear. More specific examples and a clearer explanation of how these examples support the argument would strengthen the response. Additionally, the conclusion could be more substantial, providing a clear summary of the main points discussed.
Suggestions
- Ensure that each paragraph contains a clear topic sentence and that all the information in the paragraph supports this topic.
- Provide more specific examples to support your arguments.