Some people think that children should grow up in the countryside than a big city Do you agree or disagree?

Some individuals believe that every child should come of age in the counrty than an enormous town.I compeletly agree with this opinion.
The first fundamental reason for young kids should spend their early years in the counrtysides is merit they can obtain from their deep relationships among people living there.For example, unlike crowded cities where people do not know each other, in many societies in local small towns, people know each other well and care about their own neighbours.Children are raised as the family members of the society and they can enjoy the feeling of belongingness.This is a great asset for kids and young adults throughout their entire lives.
The second most significant benefit for young people to spend their early days in counrtyside is that natural environmentsin those areas can provide tremendous good effects to their physical health.For instance, as opposed to large dense places, counrtysides have fewer houses , less noise , much fewer wastes and instead, they have plenty of open spaces, more trees and green fields.Atmosphera is much better there and far less pollution exits.All of these conditions give a wonderful background for children to build physical health in their early days.
In conclusion, as discussed above, raising young kids in rural places as opposed to in crowded metropolitan areas has huge advantages.They can develop warm human relationship among the people in the area as well they can grow to be mentally and physically robust adults thanks to the places better natural environments.Overall, they can be stronger human beings who have clear sense of belongingness among the people they lived when they are small.

6.5

The essay is logically organized and the progression of ideas is clear. However, there are some issues with the use of cohesive devices and the overall cohesion of the essay. The essay follows a logical structure, but the use of cohesive devices is sometimes inaccurate or missing, making the progression of ideas a bit difficult to follow. Additionally, the conclusion could be more effective in summarizing the main points and reiterating the stance.

Suggestions

Use a variety of cohesive devices to ensure smooth transition between ideas.
Make sure to link all the ideas in a paragraph to the main point of the paragraph.

The essay uses a sufficient range of vocabulary and there is evidence of some less common and idiomatic language. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation. The essay demonstrates a good command of a wide range of vocabulary related to the topic, with some less common and idiomatic language. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choices that could be revised for clarity and accuracy.

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, and there are few grammatical errors. However, there are some errors in article and preposition usage. The essay uses a variety of sentence structures, and the majority of sentences are free of grammatical errors. However, there are a few instances of incorrect verb forms and sentence structures that could be revised for clarity and accuracy.

The essay addresses the task effectively, presenting a clear position throughout the response. However, the argument could be more fully developed and supported with specific examples. The essay effectively addresses the prompt by discussing the benefits of children growing up in the countryside as opposed to in a big city. The writer presents a clear position and supports it with relevant examples. However, the argument could be more fully developed, and the essay could provide a more detailed exploration of the counter-argument.