Some people think that tourism endangers culture while others believe that it is a beneficial. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Whereas tourism is a topic that often sparks debate due to its potential impact on culture. Many give a thought that tourism is beneficial, while others think vice versa; it means they think it is dangerous for culture. From my perspective, the future of tourism is in our hands; if we act with responsible management, tourism can benefit and preserve culture, but sometimes tourism leads to the erosion of cultural identity.
On the one hand, the core reason why it is believed to be a positive is that tourism enhances the country’s popularity and importance among other countries. This is because it attracts international attention and fosters cultural exchange. For that reason, tourism does not endanger culture. An example: when tourists visit the historical part of one country, this not only makes a profit for the economy but also stimulates the value of the ancient places . Therefore, that country becomes well-known.
Conversely, the primary reason why it is mentioned as a negative is because the erosion of the cultural identity depends on tourism. People alter clothes, rituals, or architecture in an effort to be more appealing for tourists. For instance, one changes some portions of the old building to make it more charming. As a result, they diminish the real appearance of that. Furthermore, many try to imitate tourists’ wearing style, and then they lose their own.
In my opinion, with the balance between tourism and cultural heritage, we can create a potential bridge between them. Take ‘Open Days’ as an excellent example; on that day we exchange our ideas with foreigners and we save traditional customs.
In conclusion, tourism has both downsides and upsides for culture. If we keep balance, it is not too detrimental for the loss of culture.

7.0

The essay is logically organized and the ideas are connected well. However, there are a few areas where the flow of ideas could be improved. The essay follows a logical structure, but transitions between paragraphs and within paragraphs could be smoother. The introduction sets up the topic well, but the connection between different points could be enhanced with more explicit linking phrases. The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points but could be more comprehensive.

Suggestions

Use more linking words to improve the flow of ideas.
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear central topic.

The essay uses a good range of vocabulary and there is evidence of some less common and idiomatic language. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choice. The essay demonstrates a good command of a wide range of vocabulary related to the topic. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choice that could be revised for clarity. Additionally, the use of more specific examples could enhance the discussion.

The essay uses a variety of complex structures. However, there are a few grammatical errors and awkward constructions. The essay uses a variety of sentence structures and is generally grammatically accurate. However, there are a few minor errors that could be corrected for clarity. Additionally, the use of more complex grammatical structures could enhance the discussion.

The essay addresses the task effectively, presenting a clear position throughout. However, the discussion could be more fully developed in places. The essay addresses the topic by discussing both the positive and negative impacts of tourism on culture. The writer presents a clear position and supports it with relevant examples. However, the discussion could be more fully developed in some areas. Additionally, the conclusion could be more comprehensive.