TASK 2

Recent days, being a volunteer is becoming popular among young people. Due to this, thera are some questions such as why is volunteering being common, whether it is more useful for volunteers themselves or community. In my view, it can be effective for both volunteer and community, too.
There are a few key reasons why a voluntary work is so common among young people. Firstly, volunteering can give an opportunity to young individuals to gain experience, as well as develop new skills like as teamwork, communication and leadership. Secondly, adolescents or young adulthoods feel a sense of community and belonging by participating in voluntary events. Those two factors might be an accurate response to the initial question.
When it comes to the benefits of this to volunteer themselves. Being employment in unpaid works would be developmental stage for young people future development. In other words, volunteering serves as a bridge to employment, because young people visit to a wide range of places while working in unpaid jobs, for example company or environmental places. In that case, volunteers can familiarise with new environments and gain experience.
For instance, being an unpaid employee in a local market or retailing place, young person has a chance to improve his knowledge and skill in terms of selling.
As for community, a lot of people, particularly children, those who are living in developing countries, cam can be knowledgeable in terms of literacy and different language skills through the volunteers. That is to say, there are some countries where some children do not have potential to study because of poorness of money, professional experts and educational facilities. However, those who are volunteers travel to these places in order to share their knowledge and teach subjects such as a math, history and various foreign languages to children.
In conclusion, employment in unpaid works is becoming a very common for everyone, especially in young people. I firmly believe that reasons of this are obvious to everyone and i think that the advantages of volunteering are equally helpful for young individuals and society.

6.5

The essay is logically organized and the progression of ideas is clear. However, there are some issues with the use of cohesive devices and the overall cohesion of the essay. The essay follows a logical structure, but the use of cohesive devices is sometimes inaccurate or missing, making the connection between ideas less smooth. Additionally, the conclusion could be more effective in summarizing the key points and reinforcing the overall argument.

Suggestions

Use a variety of cohesive devices to ensure smooth transition between ideas.
Make sure to link all the ideas in a paragraph to the main point of the paragraph.

The essay uses a wide range of vocabulary and there is evidence of less common and idiomatic language. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation. The essay demonstrates a good command of a wide range of vocabulary related to the topic of volunteering. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choices that could be revised for clarity and precision. Additionally, the use of more varied and precise language could help to strengthen the argument and make the essay more engaging.

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms and there are few grammatical errors. However, there are some errors in article and preposition usage, as well as in verb tense consistency. The essay demonstrates a good command of grammar and sentence structure, with a variety of sentence types used effectively. However, there are a few instances of incorrect verb forms and tense consistency that could be revised for clarity and accuracy. Additionally, the use of more varied sentence structures could help to make the writing more engaging and dynamic.

The essay addresses the task effectively, providing a clear position throughout the response. The essay effectively addresses the prompt by discussing the reasons for the popularity of volunteering among young people and its benefits to both the individuals and the community. The writer presents a clear introduction and conclusion, and the body paragraphs are well-organized and focused. However, the essay could be improved by providing more specific examples to support the arguments and by ensuring that the ideas are fully developed and explained.