Task2
The debate over the whether the affect of social media has been subject of youth and potential solutions. Nowadays, the impact of networks is being increasingly popular year by year. While this can be largely attributed to a combination reason of expanding social networks, while there are more drawbacks for younger generation. I firmly believe that this challenge can be effectively addressed by adding some mesmerising activities at school and university. With escalating harassment through online platforms.
One significant reason for addicted to social media by younger generation, is in learning places, there is no any captivating actions for getting distract to youth people. In addition, majority of younger generation is used to sleep at night, leading a mental health issues such as anxiety, depression, body image concerns. As a consequnce, people tend to being thin. Furthermore, collaborating with unfamiliar people, causing to huge influences to people’s nurture. It can changed to detrimental side. If left curved continued, it makes extremely challenging for parents to bring up.
Individuals when they are supposed to do escalating harassment through online networks. Meanwhile, incorporate some fascinating activities for disturbing of people. If prevent this condition, it makes changed to positive side. As a stand out of example, government avoids some health issues which are stress, obesity. Moreover, encourage youth to take breaks from social media and engage in mindful activities, also it cultivate real-world relationships and develop offline social support systems. As a result, youth people will be confident and they can create their self-esteem.
Not only does it inspire youth to take breaks from social media, but also it allows to improve their offline social support systems. It can be seen, after developing his mind, people will changed to positive side.
The essay is difficult to follow due to a lack of clear organization and coherence. Ideas are not well-connected, and there is no clear progression in the argument. The use of informal language disrupts the flow of the essay. The essay would benefit from a more structured approach, with clear paragraphs and logical transitions between ideas.
Suggestions
- Use a more formal tone and style.
- Ensure that each paragraph has a clear central idea and that all sentences in the paragraph relate to this central idea.
The essay uses a range of vocabulary, but there are some inaccuracies and informal language is used throughout the essay. The essay demonstrates a basic range of vocabulary, but there are some inaccuracies and informal language is used throughout the essay. More formal and precise language would enhance the essay’s quality. Additionally, ensuring correct spelling and grammar usage would improve overall readability.
The essay contains numerous grammatical errors that make it difficult to read and understand. There is a lack of variety in sentence structures, and some sentences are overly complex or awkward. The use of informal language affects the accuracy of grammar and punctuation. To improve the essay, the focus should be on correcting grammatical errors and using a more varied sentence structure. Additionally, ensuring proper punctuation and spacing will enhance readability.
The essay addresses the topic but lacks a clear and consistent focus. The essay makes some relevant points but does not fully develop them. The conclusion is weak and does not effectively summarize the main points discussed. To improve the essay, the focus should be on staying on topic and ensuring that each point is well-developed and supported with evidence. Additionally, the conclusion should be strengthened by summarizing the main points discussed and providing a clear final thought.
Suggestions
- Ensure that you stay on topic and that your points are well-developed.
- Strengthen your conclusion by summarizing the main points discussed and providing a clear final thought.