The best way to teach children to cooperate is through team sports at school. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Team games are considered to be the best way to teach children how to cooperate. I partly agree with this statement, though sport undoubtedly contributes to developing collaboration skills, I do not think other subjects deal with it worse.
On the one hand, a common pursuit for victory makes kids unite and come up with creative ideas to defeat opponents. In other words, it teaches them to take responsibilities not only for themselves but for others, and demonstrates that sometimes it is important to forget about personal attitudes to achieve a desired result. At the moment, the ability and readiness to cooperate are essential for any employee because they represent the driving force of the working process.
Another point to consider is that there are more effective ways through which a child may learn how to be a part of a team. Games will not work with those who are not interested in it at all, and as a result do not care about the final result. Without a shadow of a doubt, it may be said that team work might be included in the plan of any lesson and be not less effective. Therefore, this is certainly wrong to claim that team sport best shows the importance of joint efforts.
In conclusion, although the positive effect of team plays is undeniable, it is not better than other subjects in the cource.

6.5

The essay is logically organized and ideas are connected well. However, there are a few areas where the flow of ideas could be improved. The essay follows a logical structure, but transitions between paragraphs and within paragraphs could be smoother. The introduction clearly states the position, but the connection between different points could be enhanced with more explicit linking phrases. The conclusion restates the position but could be more comprehensive.

Suggestions

Use a variety of linking words to connect your ideas more effectively.
Ensure that your conclusion fully summarizes the arguments you have made in the essay.

The essay uses a wide range of vocabulary and there is evidence of less common and idiomatic language. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choice. The essay demonstrates a good command of a wide range of vocabulary relevant to the topic. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choice that could be revised for clarity. Additionally, the use of more precise and varied vocabulary could enhance the essay.

The essay uses a variety of complex structures. However, there are a few grammatical errors and awkward constructions. The essay uses a variety of sentence structures and is generally grammatically accurate. However, there are a few minor errors that could be corrected for clarity. Additionally, the use of more complex grammatical structures could enhance the essay.

The essay addresses the task and presents a clear position throughout the response. However, the argument could be more fully developed and supported. The essay addresses the prompt by discussing the effectiveness of team sports in teaching children cooperation. The writer presents a clear position that is well-developed and supported with relevant examples. However, the essay could benefit from a more formal tone and style. Additionally, the conclusion could more effectively summarize the main points and restate the position.