The chart below gives information about global population percentages and distribution of wealth by region.
The graph illustrates how many percentage of people and wealth rate considered in different regions.Overall, the biggest difference between population and wealth stake in the USA and China,where wealth ratio is more in the former and people are more in the latter
In the three out of eight regions have positive wealth ratio.Among European countries wealth-population exceeds over two times self population that reach 30% and 15% respectively,in the North America and Rich Asia-Pacific areas have the same 5% of people but in wealth proportion have 15% of gaps between each other
Other five regions which is considering overpopulation.In Africa,China, India and Other Asia-pacific countries gap between both aspects is bigger and in first three countries where share of population is higher 15 times than wealth proportion, however in Latin America and Caribbean situation with this is more better and wealth proportion consider half percentage of people
The essay has some organization but lacks clear cohesion and coherence. Ideas are somewhat connected but transitions between them are not smooth.
Suggestions
- Use clear linking words to connect ideas.
- Ensure each paragraph has a clear topic sentence.
- Summarize key points at the end.
The essay uses a limited range of vocabulary with some inaccuracies. There is repetition of words and phrases.
The essay contains frequent grammatical errors that impede understanding. Sentence structures are often incorrect.
The essay addresses the task but lacks detailed analysis and clear comparisons. Some key data points are missing or unclear.
Suggestions
- Provide specific data to support statements.
- Include more detailed comparisons.
- Ensure all regions are clearly analyzed.