The chart below gives information about how families in one country spent their weekly income in 1968 and in 2018. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
The chart shows the percentages of weekly income how spent by families in one country during the 50 years
Overall, in the 1968 families spent on food 3 times more than other categories, however in 2018 the categories little bit balanced.
Families in 2018 spent on food 35 percentage of their weekly income which is the most percentage among other categories and the lowest was fuel and power with 6 percentage of income. Families paid corresponding, 10, percentage to housing and clothing, footware, whereas leisure activities required a bit little,9, than the categories. Household, personal goods and transport also required correspondent 7 percentage of income
In the 2018 the highest percentage was 22 and belonged to the category leisure, whereas the lowest was fuel and power as 1968, but with 4 percentage, in addition personal goods was with 4 percentage. In contrast 1968 the percentage of food was decreased by 2 times to 17 also clothing and footware decreased by 2 times. Housing expenses reversal to food increased almost by 2 times, to 19. Families paid on transport 14 percentage. Household goods remained same as 1968
The essay has a logical flow of information and ideas, and the writer has used some cohesive devices to link ideas. However, there are some areas where the use of cohesive devices is inaccurate or missing, which can make the progression of ideas unclear. Additionally, the use of referencing and substitution techniques is not always effective, which can lead to confusion. There are also some issues with paragraphing and the overall structure of the essay, which can make it difficult for the reader to follow the information smoothly.
Suggestions
- Use a variety of cohesive devices to ensure smooth transitions between ideas and sentences.
- Make sure to use referencing and substitution techniques effectively to avoid confusion.
- Improve the overall structure and organization of the essay to enhance coherence and cohesion.
The essay demonstrates a sufficient range of vocabulary and some awareness of collocation. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation, which can affect the clarity and naturalness of the writing. Additionally, there are some issues with spelling and word formation, which can detract from the overall effectiveness of the essay.
The essay demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence forms and a variety of grammatical structures. However, there are some errors in grammar, punctuation, and sentence structure, which can affect the overall clarity and coherence of the writing. Additionally, there are some issues with paragraphing and the overall organization of the essay, which can detract from the overall quality of the writing.
The essay provides a clear overview and detailed information on the chart, making appropriate comparisons where relevant. However, the essay could be improved by providing more detailed explanations and analysis of the data. Additionally, the essay could be more concise and focused, with less repetition and redundancy.
Suggestions
- Provide more detailed explanations and analysis of the data to enhance the depth and richness of the response.
- Make the essay more concise and focused, with less repetition and redundancy.