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The chart below shows the percentage of adults of different age groups in the UK who used the Internet everyday form 2003-2006.

the bar chart illustrate data about daily internet usage in different age groups in UK , over three-year period between 2003 and 2006
in general, internet use grew in all age groups and biggest users are 16-24 year olds . although 65 + aged people saw an increase , they showed slight change .
firstly , looking for top users . 16-24 year olds started at 80 in 2003 and in 2004 the figure for 16-24 year old users standed at same level . in 2005 16-24 user amount showed dramatic increase to 100 and this percentage changed to 90 in 2006 . 65+ users amount equal to 0 in 2003 and the figure for over the 65 users increased to 17 in 2004 . the proportion of 65+ users saw slight fall to 16 in2005 . in 2006, the figure for over 65 year old changed to 20 .
between 2003 and 2004 25-44 year olds saw sharp increase from 50 to 60 and it changed to 70 in 2005 . in 2006 , the share of 25-44 year old users showed dramatic increase to 80 . 45-54 year old user started at 60 in 2003 ad the figure for 45-64 year olds changed to 70 in 2004 . between 2005 and 2006, 45-54 aged users increased slightly . people between 55-64 started at 30 . between 2004 and 2005 , 55-64 aged users showed a slight decrease from 35 to 32 and it changed to 50 in 2006

4.5

The essay attempts to organize information logically but lacks clear structure and paragraphing. Transitions between ideas are abrupt, and some comparisons are unclear.

Suggestions
  • Use clear paragraphing to separate different points.
  • Add linking words to improve flow.
  • Ensure each paragraph has a clear topic sentence.

The vocabulary is basic and repetitive, with some errors in word choice and formality.

Frequent grammatical errors affect readability. Issues with verb tense, punctuation, and sentence structure are present.

The essay addresses the task but lacks detail and some inaccuracies are present. The overview is basic, and key features are not fully developed.

Suggestions
  • Provide a clearer overview.
  • Include more detailed comparisons and data.
  • Ensure accuracy in reporting data.