The diagram shows how instant noodles are manufactured.
The flow diagram illustrates the production process for instant noodle.We can see that noodles are made using eight main raw materials.
At the first stage in the production of noodles,flour is stored in the storage silos.Next, flour,water and oil are mixed together.Then, this mixture is stirred in rollers to produce noodles.The combined noodles can then be shaped, by dough sheets and dough strips,to create the end products,namely noodles discs. After that, the produced noodles are sorted and then cooked with oil and dried in order to remove any oils.
Subsequently, at the seventh stage of manufacturing ,vegetables and spices are added to the noodles and placed in cups,and the resulting noodles can finally the cups are sealed and labelled.
The essay is logically organized and presents a clear progression of ideas. However, there are some issues with the flow of information and the use of cohesive devices.
Suggestions
- Use a variety of cohesive devices to improve the flow of information.
- Ensure that each paragraph has a clear central topic and that all sentences in the paragraph relate to this topic.
The essay uses a sufficient range of vocabulary and there is evidence of some less common and idiomatic language. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choice.
The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms and there are only minor errors. However, there is room for improvement in terms of grammatical accuracy and the use of punctuation.
The essay provides a clear overview of the process and generally addresses all parts of the task. However, the essay could be improved by providing more detailed explanations and by ensuring that all information is accurately represented.
Suggestions
- Provide more detailed explanations of each stage of the process.
- Ensure that all information is accurately represented, particularly with regard to the use of terms.