The graph below shows the average consumption of cheese per person in England, Scotland, Wales and Northern Ireland between 1980 and 2020.
The graph illustrates the average amount of cheese consumed per person in 4 different countries over 40 years, from 1980 to 2020.
Looking from an overall perspective, it is clear that Scottish people ate the biggest portion of cheese in 1990 before reaching the lowest point in the final year. Whereas, Wales and Northern Ireland showed a stable upward trend throughout the whole period.
Firstly, England and Scotland showed an overall downward trend. But in the first ten years Scotland reached its highest point with 100 kilograms per person. However, England had a stable downward trend during the entire period with a drop of 25 kilograms per capita.
Lastly, Wales and Northern Ireland had gradual upward trends, starting with about 45 kilograms and 10 kilograms respectively. Moreover, two countries had parallel growth until 2020, reaching their all-time high points, Wales around 80 kilograms and Northern Ireland 60 kilograms.
The essay presents information in a logical order, but transitions between points could be smoother.
Suggestions
- Use more linking words to connect ideas.
- Ensure each paragraph focuses on a single main idea.
- Clarify comparisons between countries.
The essay uses a range of vocabulary accurately, but some repetition is present.
The essay demonstrates a good range of grammatical structures with minor errors.
The essay addresses the task effectively, providing a clear overview and details. However, some data points could be more precise.
Suggestions
- Include specific data points for clarity.
- Ensure all trends are accurately described.