The graph below shows the percentage of unemployed people aged between 15 and 24 in five European countries in 2005, compared with the overall percentage of unemployment in those countries.
The bar chart compares proportion of unemployment individuals were aged between 15 and 24 in five European countries in 2005.
Overall, Poland and Italy exhibited the highest numbers, while the opposition true for that the Denmark in unemployed person 15-24 years old. This trend is true for that Poland and also Germany accompanied it doing so in terms of overall unemployment. Denmark, Hungary and Italy, on the other hand, had the lowest figure of the category in overall unemployment.
Regarding jobless rate in the age between 15 – 24, the figure for Poland was the highest at 37 which is distantly followed by Italy with just under 28. Hungary and Germany had nearly identical figures of 24 and 22. The lowest figure, however, was seen in Denmark, with each 8 percentage of African who unemployed.
As for the overall unemployment figures, Poland and Germany have has the significant higher rate of unemployment percentage than the other continents did; the former one shown that 28 percent of overall rate of unemployment, making slightly higher than the latter with 20 percent. The figures for Italy was 15 percent, making it slightly higher than that encountered in Hungary with around 13.5 percent and Denmark with 8 percentage of overall unemployment rate in 2005.
The essay lacks clear organization and logical progression of ideas. Transitions between sentences and paragraphs are weak, causing confusion.
Suggestions
- Use clearer topic sentences for each paragraph.
- Improve transitions between ideas.
- Summarize key points more effectively.
The essay uses a limited range of vocabulary with some inaccuracies.
Frequent grammatical errors and awkward sentence structures impede clarity.
The essay addresses the task but lacks detailed analysis and clarity in presenting data.
Suggestions
- Provide more detailed comparisons between countries.
- Ensure accuracy in describing data.
- Clarify the main trends observed.