The graph shows the percentage of households in one country that had various goods between 2001 and in 2008.
The proportion of 8 distinct items that belong to families, which categorized in two separated years, 2001 and 2008, are shown in the bar graph. There is no specifications about the country, the information gathered in.
Overall, the larger items from families are all items except telephone in 2008, while telephone was took more in 2001. The figures pf desktop computer in 2001 almost doubled and also dishwasher doubled. In 2008 internet and mobile phones dramatically charged.
In 2001, 95%, almost every single families had telephone, but in 2008 the one declined on 5% in addition microwave rised on 10% till 2008 and also CD player rised on 10%. The 3 counted items not only rised, but also in 2008 they were corresponded with each other with 90%. Figures of clothes dryer in 2001were 60% and in 2008 10% higher.
Figures of dishwasher in 2001 were 20% and in 2008 figures doubled in addition desktop computer also almost doubled, from 35% to 65%. Mobile phones from 25% rised more than 3 times to 80%, moreover the largest rise, internet rised on 6 times, from 10% to 60%.
The essay provides a general overview of the data but lacks clear organization and logical progression of ideas. Some comparisons are made, but they are not well-structured.
Suggestions
- Organize information logically by grouping similar items or trends.
- Use linking words to connect ideas and comparisons.
- Ensure each paragraph has a clear central idea.
The essay uses a limited range of vocabulary with some inaccuracies and repetition. There are attempts to use more complex words, but they are often incorrect or awkward.
The essay contains frequent grammatical errors, including incorrect verb forms, prepositions, and sentence structures. These errors interfere with understanding.
The essay addresses the task but lacks detail and clarity in describing trends and making comparisons. Some key features are mentioned, but not all are clearly explained.
Suggestions
- Provide a clearer overview of the main trends and comparisons.
- Include more specific data to support descriptions.
- Ensure all key features from the graph are mentioned and explained.