The leaders or directors of organizations are often older people. But some people say that young people can also be leaders. Do you agree or disagree.
There is a debate over which age group should work as leaders and directors , with some people supporting older people due to their experience , while others find elderly people perfect to that position as they have gained more knowledge . However , i strongly believe that older people are suitable for that job for several reasons , including their experience and wise decision-making abilities.
The importance of ideal leaders , directors for both organization and school play a vital role in company’s next prosperity and development . Thus , employing older people to that position offers more benefits, that in turn , help company ,school to develop and last its career for a long time . One of the main important role of older people in leader’s job is having more experience, being expert that field. During their working experience , they have gained more knowledge and faced problems , such as crisis at companies and learned how to manage ina mean time before their younger counterpart encountered . In addition to this, they have already found solutions and practiced those methods in company in a bid to tackle if they face again . Also, if they work that position , they are likely to lean their workplace into development stage.
Another advantage may be their wise decision-making . Because , they have acquired necessary skills , characteristics , such as patience ,perseverance and having far- sighted abilities . Before they make some changes to the system or work environment , they discuss with staff and beware of its consequences . In other words, their decisions will be perfectly planned and then implemented. For example , before changing the schedule in schools, they take into account every factors with discussing teachers in that fields and if necessary, do questionnaires to make it ideal. hence, It is clear that those efforts require much time and you should be patient in those circumstances . When it comes to younger people , they have a tendency avoid to allocate much time and make decisions swiftly ,as a result suffer from repercussions with staying no options .
To sum up , employing older people to that job categories benefits more because of their experience and suitable characteristics , as mentioned before compared to their young counterparts .
The essay is logically organized and the progression of ideas is clear. However, there are some issues with the use of cohesive devices and the overall cohesion of the essay. The essay is generally well-organized, with clear paragraphs dedicated to discussing the benefits of older people’s experience and wise decision-making abilities. However, the overall cohesion could be improved with more effective use of transitional phrases and clearer topic sentences.
Suggestions
- Use a variety of cohesive devices to improve the flow of your writing. For example, you could use more linking words and phrases to connect your ideas more clearly.
- Ensure that each paragraph has a clear central topic and that all sentences in the paragraph relate to this topic.
The essay demonstrates a good command of a broad lexical repertoire. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choice. The essay demonstrates a good range of vocabulary, with appropriate use of academic language. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choice that could be revised for clarity and precision.
The essay uses a variety of complex structures. However, there are a few grammatical errors and awkward constructions. The essay attempts to use a range of grammatical structures, but there are several errors in sentence structure and tense usage that could be revised for clarity. Additionally, some sentences are overly long and complex, which could be simplified for better readability.
The essay addresses the task effectively, presenting a clear position throughout the response. However, the argument could be more fully developed and supported with specific examples. The essay clearly states the writer’s opinion that older people are more suitable for leadership roles due to their experience and wise decision-making abilities. However, the argument could be further developed with more specific examples and evidence to support these claims. Additionally, the conclusion could be strengthened by summarizing the main points and restating the writer’s position more emphatically.
Suggestions
- Ensure that you fully develop your arguments and support them with specific examples. This will help to make your position more convincing and your writing more engaging.