The line graph describes changes in the proportion of elderly people spending their free time in various ways, in the US, a decade apart (from 1980 to 2010).
The line graph provides information on how the proportion of older people who spent their free time on five different activities, namely reading, hiking, theatre, watching TV and surfing the net changed from 1980 to 2010.
In general, the share of all categories witnessed an upward trend with the exception of theatre over the examined timeframe, with hiking rising significantly and becoming the most preferable when the period was over.
Looking at the biggest rises in more detail, 20% of free time of older people was spent on hiking in the beginning of the period, followed by soaring to exactly 80% in 2010, making it the highest rate. The lowest free time activity was surfing the internet initially, making up a mere 5%, a figure then rose dramatically to about 14% in 2000 before seeing tripling to just under 50% in 2010. Starting at around 30%, the share of reading by the old saw a visible fluctuation till 2000, declining by 10 percentage points. After which the figure for it had seen a sharp growth to exactly 60% by the end of the period.
Watching TV, however, its percentage was almost 60% in the first year, and it rose constantly to 70% in 2000 before dropping slightly to approximately 66% in the final year. As for the remaining ones, the proportion of spending leisure time on theatre stood at 50% in 1980, before it saw a general decrease, with a low of 30% in 1990.
The essay is logically organized and presents a clear overview of the data. The information is sequenced in a way that makes it easy to follow the trends, and there is good use of cohesive devices to link ideas and sentences.
Suggestions
- Consider using a wider range of linking words and phrases to show more variety.
The essay uses a good range of vocabulary and there is evidence of less common and idiomatic language. The vocabulary is generally used appropriately with only minor errors.
The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms and there are only minor errors in grammar and punctuation.
The essay addresses all parts of the task and presents a clear overview of the main trends, differences or stages. The essay also provides specific details and examples to support the main points.
Suggestions
- Ensure that all data is accurately represented and clearly explained.
- Make sure to fully address all parts of the task and provide a detailed analysis.