The online currency ahs become very popular in recent year. Why is that? Is this a positive or negative development?
With the advent of the internet, cryptocurrencies have become quite popular and spread across all nations. It is not a secret that individuals can earn a lot of money through online currencies, which is why it is now well-known around the world. This essay will discuss why this trend is mostly negative since along with making quick and easy money, there is also a risk of losing it.
On the one hand, cryptocurrency can offer a good source of making passive as well as active income as it is shown in numerous peoples’ experiences. That is to say that as long as apporpriate and sufficient research is conducted, one can earn a good amount of money by investing in cryptocurrencies such as BitCoin, Etherium, TonCoin and others. Ever since this scheme came up, people have realized its potential and have been harvesting it. For example, BitCoin grew from 60 000 dollars to almost 100 000 dollars in the previous two weeks, causing even more enthusiasm in people who are interested in online currencies. However, it is not say that there are not any drawbacks to investing in cryptocurrencies since it can be extremely risky.
It has been suggested that this trend is negative for the most part since many people lack expertise in cryptocurrency, which is why it might, in fact, be more financially draining than profitable. In other words, when a person blindly follows the trends without any proper knowledge, they might put their money in the wrong stocks which can lead to losses in the long-term. Moreover, it is often the case that hackers hack into online currencies and steal people’s money, meaning that it can also be unsafe. This, in turn, can have severe consequences to not only people’s wallets, but also their health in general. For instance, in Uzbekistan a lot of people take loans from banks and invest that money into cryptocurrencies without any guidance or research, leading them to lose all that money.
In conclusion, while online currency has taken the world by storm, offering people an easy and fast way to make money, it is also of paramount importance to bear in mind that impulsive and primitive approach to it can be followed by serious effects.
The essay is logically organized and the ideas are connected well. However, there are a few areas where the flow of ideas could be improved. The essay follows a logical structure, but transitions between paragraphs and within paragraphs could be smoother. The introduction sets up the topic well, but the connection between different points could be enhanced with more explicit linking phrases. The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points but could be more comprehensive.
Suggestions
- Use more linking words to improve the flow of ideas.
- Ensure that each paragraph has a clear central topic.
The essay uses a wide range of vocabulary and there is evidence of some less common and idiomatic language. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choice. The essay demonstrates a good command of a wide range of vocabulary related to the topic. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choice that could be revised for clarity. For example, the phrase “It has been suggested that this trend is negative for the most part” could be rephrased as “Many believe that this trend has more negative than positive aspects.”
The essay uses a variety of complex structures. However, there are a few grammatical errors and awkward constructions. The essay uses a variety of sentence structures, and the overall grammar is quite good. However, there are a few minor errors that could be corrected for clarity. For example, in the sentence “On the one hand, cryptocurrency can offer a good source of making passive as well as active income as it is shown in numerous peoples’ experiences,” the phrase “as it is shown in numerous peoples’ experiences” is a bit awkward and could be rephrased for clarity.
The essay addresses the task effectively, presenting a clear position throughout. However, the argument could be more fully developed in places. The essay effectively addresses the prompt by discussing both the potential benefits and drawbacks of the popularity of online currency. The writer presents a clear position that the trend is mostly negative, and supports this with relevant arguments and examples. However, the essay could be improved by providing more specific examples and data to support the claims made.
Suggestions
- Provide more specific examples and data to support your arguments.
- Ensure that each paragraph fully develops a single point.