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The only reason why people work hard is to earn money and there is no other reason for doing so.

Many people believe that money is the only reason for working hard. While money is an important motivator, I disagree with the idea that it is the only factor driving people to work hard. There are also other reasons such as personal achievement, passion, and a sense of duty.
Firstly, money is undeniably a key motivator. People need money to cover essential needs like food, housing, and education. For instance, individuals may work overtime or take additional jobs to support their families or secure a better future. Without financial stability, it would be difficult for people to live comfortably, making money a significant factor in their hard work.
However, not everyone works only for money. Many people find personal satisfaction in their jobs. For example, a scientist or artist may spend long hours working because they take pride in their achievements, even if the financial rewards are limited.
Passion also drives people to work hard. People who are passionate about their work, like teachers or doctors, often put in extra effort because they enjoy making a difference in others’ lives, rather than just for financial gain.

In conclusion, while money is a major factor, it is not the only reason people work hard. Personal satisfaction, passion, and responsibility also play important roles in motivating people.

7.5

The essay is logically organized and ideas are connected well. The introduction and conclusion are clear and related to the topic. However, there could be better use of linking words to connect ideas and sentences more effectively.

Suggestions
  • Use a variety of linking words to connect ideas and sentences more effectively.
  • Ensure that each paragraph has a clear central topic and that all sentences in the paragraph relate to this topic.

The essay uses a wide range of vocabulary and there is evidence of less common and idiomatic language. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choice.

The essay uses a wide range of complex structures. There are a few minor errors, but they do not impede communication.

The essay addresses the task effectively, presenting a clear position throughout the response. The essay provides relevant, extended and supported ideas.

Suggestions
  • Ensure that each paragraph fully develops one main idea and that all sentences in the paragraph relate to this idea.
  • Consider providing more specific examples to support your arguments.