The pie charts show energy sources in Australia in 2008 and predictions for 2030
The pie charts depict the information about energy sources in Australia in 2008 and predictions for 2030.
It is clear that the proportions in 2030 are expected to change dramatically. In 2008, the highest and lowest percentages were in coal and in hydro respectively. Looking to the percentages of 2030, the oil energy is predicted to be the lowest as in 2008.
In Australia, in 2008, the percantages of energy sources were different from each other. In that year, the proportion of wind energy was 0,30 % , and it is expected to be 0,80 while the other energy sources were 4,30%. It is noticeable that the coal enegy was on top proportion in 2008. However, the status of hydro energy was the same lowest level in 2008 and 2030, but it is expected to be higher in 2030 for 0,50% and it would be 0,70%
In 2030, the proportions are expected to change noticeable rather than in 2008. While the proportion of coal was the highest in 2008, it is expected to reduce 22,30%. Furthermore, the percentage of other energy sources and geothermal are predicted to be in a same 4,30% in 2030. The proportion of gas energy source was 22,90% in 2008 and is expected to increase 32,00% in 2030. It is clear the highest energy source in 2008 was coal which is 39,00%, coming to 2030, the proportion of oil energy if is forecasted to be the highest which is 35,50%
The essay attempts to compare the energy sources between 2008 and 2030 but lacks clear organization and logical flow. There are some abrupt shifts between ideas, making it difficult to follow.
Suggestions
- Use clear paragraphing to separate ideas.
- Ensure logical progression of ideas.
- Use linking words to connect sentences smoothly.
The vocabulary used is basic and sometimes inaccurate. There is a lack of variety in word choice.
The essay contains several grammatical errors and awkward sentence constructions.
The essay addresses the task but lacks clear and accurate details from the chart.
Suggestions
- Provide accurate data from the charts.
- Ensure all relevant information is included.