The proportion of the people
The charts show the case of relationship among the people in two countries, Australia and Canada.
Overall,it is clear that the percentage of divorced people is the lowest in both countries Australia and Canada.It is also noteworthy that proportion of married people is the highest in Australia,while not-legally divorced people’s percentage dominates in Canada.while there is nobody who is the same gender,it indicates its proportion in Canada.
In Canada,the proportion of the who are never married is 70% while, this indicates 5% in Australia.It is also noteworthy that the proportion of married people is 29% in Canada, however,in Australia,this indicates significantly higher proportion,with 46%.The segment of the estranged people is 41% in Australia, while this indicates remarkably higher proportion in Canada, with 53%.
The percentage of the same gender is 3% in Canada,while there is no indication regarding this in Australia.It is also evident that percentage of legally parted people is 2% in Canada, while this indicates slightly lower proportion in Australia,with 1%.The bereaved people indicate almost the same proportion in two countries,with 7% in Canada and 6% percent with slightly difference in Australia.
The essay lacks clear organization and logical flow. Some sentences are disconnected, making it difficult to follow the comparisons between the two countries.
Suggestions
- Use linking words to improve flow.
- Organize information logically.
- Ensure each paragraph has a clear focus.
The essay uses a limited range of vocabulary with some repetition. Some word choices are inappropriate or unclear.
The essay contains grammatical errors and awkward sentence structures that affect clarity.
The essay addresses the task but lacks clarity in some areas. Some data is misinterpreted or not clearly explained.
Suggestions
- Ensure accurate representation of data.
- Clarify comparisons between countries.
- Provide a clear overview statement.