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The table below describes the number of employees and Factories in England and Wales from 1851 to 1901

The table provides data on how many employees were employeed and Factories were rubbed in two countries over a period of 50 years.
Overall,it is clear that the number of the employees declined gradually. It is also noteworthy that the number of factories saw an increase in their number expecting of starting to decline after the year of 1881.
In 1851,in the two countries there were 225 factories with the total number of 477,000 workers,it is also clear that the majority employees were males with 287,000, while the fewer females of 190,000.In 1862,some changes occured in the indicator of the two countries with adding 2 of factories.However,the total number of workers dropped to 291,000 with remaining of 131,000 males and 160,000 females.
In 1871,the hundred of factories were added and the number of them reached to 622,while the total number of the employees declined significantly with remaining only 80,123 males and 60,000 females.It is also evident that in the next year,the two countries witnessed a great increase in the number of factories and employees with adding 100 factories and declining the total number of employees from 140,123 to 126,132 with 76,132 males and 50,000 females.It is evident that in the following years,both of the countries saw a decline with declining the number of the factories to 625 greatly,and with remaining only 65,000 male workers and 40,000 female workers.It is evident that this indicator sustained to decline with remaining only 600 factories and 61,000 total workers with 31,00 males and 30,000 females in the year of 1901.

5.0

The essay has a basic structure, but lacks clear paragraphing and logical flow.

Suggestions
  • Use clear paragraphs to separate different time periods or observations.
  • Ensure logical progression of ideas.
  • Use linking words to connect sentences smoothly.

The vocabulary is basic and repetitive with occasional errors.

There are frequent grammatical errors and inconsistencies.

The essay addresses the task but lacks detail and clarity in some areas.

Suggestions
  • Provide more detailed analysis of the data.
  • Ensure all key trends and changes are clearly explained.