The table below shows the proportion of the workforce who are women and the percentage of managers who are women in five different countries. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
The table illustrates the percent of the women employee and senior members of the workplaces in countries such as Australia, Egypt, Sri-Lanka, Japan and USA.
Overall, Australia and USA take the most advantage of women in both workforce and from senior, but USA takes a bit more from workforce than Australia. However, in Egypt the figures are the least in both.
Japan takes the most workforce from women, while the figure of Sri-Lanka is the least from using women as senior.
The figure of women employees for Japan is the highest at 48% and figure for United States is lower by 2. The difference of figures Australia and Sri-Lanka is 1%, respectively 42% and 41%. The least figure is 20 and it is for Egypt.
The highest figures of senior part of workplace for Australia and USA, the figures are corresponded to each other and they have a large difference from other countries. The percentage of Japan, Egypt and Sri-Lanka are profoundly less than the higher ones, respectively 17%, 12% and 9%.
The essay lacks clear organization and logical flow. While it attempts to compare and contrast data, the connections between ideas are not always clear.
Suggestions
- Use linking words to improve flow.
- Organize the information logically, perhaps by discussing workforce and managers separately.
- Summarize the main points more clearly.
The lexical range is limited, with repetitive language and some inaccuracies.
The essay contains grammatical errors and awkward phrasing that affect clarity.
The essay addresses the task but lacks detailed analysis and clear comparison of the data.
Suggestions
- Provide more detailed analysis of the data.
- Ensure all main features are clearly summarized.
- Make comparisons more explicit.