Today many people do not know their neighbours in big cities
In big cities usually many people do not know their neighbors. This is a global problem in modern life. It might cause several issues but there are solutions to solve them.
One problem is that loneliness. If many people did not know their neighbors, they feel alone. For example, they cannot share their problems or talk to anyone confidence. The second major problem is safety. In accident, neighbors cannot help because they are not connected. Finally,it is difficult build a friendly community. People live close but they do not care about each other.
To solve this problem many people can start tiny steps. For example, they say hello or smile when they see their neighbors. Over time this can improve friendship. Communities can organize events such as small parties. This event helps people to meet and talk. Governments and create more parks where people can meet. I think also technology can help. Online groups for neighbors make it easy to communicate and plan activities.
In conclusion, not know neighbors causes loneliness, safety people and weak communities. But local events and good spaces can solve this problem. I think people should try to connect with their neighbors to improve life in cities.
Eshmuminova Gulsevar
The essay is logically organized and the progression of ideas is clear. However, there are some issues with the use of cohesive devices and the overall cohesion of the essay. The essay follows a logical structure, but the use of cohesive devices is sometimes inaccurate or missing, making the connection between ideas less smooth. Additionally, the conclusion could be more effective in summarizing the main points and reiterating the proposed solutions.
Suggestions
- Use a variety of cohesive devices to ensure smooth transition between ideas.
- Make sure to link all the ideas in a paragraph back to the main point of the paragraph.
The essay uses a sufficient range of vocabulary and there is evidence of some less common and idiomatic language. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation. The essay demonstrates a good command of a range of vocabulary related to the topic, with terms like “loneliness,” “safety,” and “community” used appropriately. However, there are some instances of awkward or incorrect word choices that could be refined for clarity and precision. Additionally, the use of more varied and specific language could help to strengthen the arguments presented.
The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms and there are few grammatical errors. However, there are some errors in article and preposition usage that could be addressed. The essay uses a variety of sentence structures effectively, with a good mix of simple and complex sentences. However, there are some grammatical errors that could be addressed to improve clarity and readability. For example, “In accident, neighbors cannot help because they are not connected” should be “In an accident, neighbors cannot help each other because they are not connected.” Paying closer attention to grammatical accuracy, particularly in terms of article and preposition usage, could help to improve the overall quality of the writing.
The essay addresses the task effectively, providing a clear position throughout the response. However, the development of ideas could be more fully supported with specific examples. The essay effectively addresses the prompt by discussing the reasons behind the lack of neighborly familiarity in big cities and proposing solutions to address this issue. The writer presents a clear explanation of the problems, such as loneliness and safety concerns, and suggests practical solutions, like organizing community events and using technology, to foster a sense of community. However, the argument could be further developed with more specific examples and a deeper exploration of the proposed solutions to strengthen the response.
Suggestions
- Include more specific examples to support your ideas.
- Ensure that each paragraph fully develops a single idea.