When asked to choose between a life without work and working most of the time, people would always choose not to work. Do you agree or disagree?

Work-life balance is difficult to maintain these days. In a survey when people were asked to select between a life with no labor and working constantly, they would always opt for not to work, but merely live. I completely disagree with this statement, as living in the present and developing simultaneously is equally important.
Majority of people are reluctant to work due to the difficult tasks and assignment. Living without working has set of benefits, though. One of the significant is you will spend your precious time with friends, family, and relatives. This, in turn, will help establish close connection with loved ones, emotionally understand one another, and relieve work stress. Moreover, this will give you opportunities to discover yourself. Exploring your interests in many fields can help you be aware of who you are, as well as engaging in hobbies is a great way to excel in a particular sphere, leading to more satisfaction in life. Therefore, living with no work is an evidence on how to feel fulfilled in life.
I, however, tend to view this negatively. This process of living will cause sedentary lifestyle and no space for personal growth. That is why, working most of the time is a better option. We, humans, are constantly evolving species, meaning we have the drive to permanently thrive. Laboring offers you many skills that you can master. Working rather than merely living will develop your abilities to acquire and apply knowledge and skills, such as critical thinking, problem-solving, decision-making, and other skills in this nature. These skills constantly develops our minds, helping us to lead more happy life and nurturing our social skills, which are essential for an individual.
In conclusion, even though living without work is advantageous, I firmly state that if we both live and work at the same time, it will benefit our potential to develop and lead a productive lifestyle simultaneously.

7.0

The essay is logically organized and ideas are connected well. However, there are a few areas where the flow of ideas could be improved. The essay follows a logical structure, but transitions between paragraphs and within paragraphs could be smoother. The introduction sets up the topic well, but the connection between different points could be enhanced with more explicit linking phrases. The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points but could be more comprehensive. Clearer topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph and more explicit linking phrases would help guide the reader through the essay. Ensuring consistent punctuation and spacing will also improve readability.

Suggestions

Use more linking words to improve the flow of ideas.
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear main idea.

The essay uses a wide range of vocabulary and there is evidence of some less common and idiomatic language. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choice. For example, “Living without working has set of benefits, though” could be rephrased as “Living without work has a set of benefits, though.” Improving lexical precision and variety will enhance the clarity and professionalism of the essay. Additionally, ensuring correct spelling and grammar usage will improve overall readability.

The essay demonstrates a good control of a range of grammatical structures, with only minor errors. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect phrasing that detract from the overall clarity and professionalism of the essay. For example, “We, humans, are constantly evolving species, meaning we have the drive to permanently thrive” could be rephrased as “As humans, we are constantly evolving, which means we have a continuous drive to thrive.” Paying closer attention to grammatical accuracy, including correct verb forms and preposition usage, will improve the overall quality of the essay.

The essay addresses the task effectively, presenting a clear position throughout the response. The essay effectively addresses the prompt by discussing the importance of work-life balance and the benefits of working. The writer presents a clear position and supports it with relevant examples. However, the essay could be improved by providing more specific examples and by ensuring that each point is fully developed. The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points but could be more comprehensive.