The three pie charts below show the changes in annual spending by a particular UK school in 1981,1991, and 2001
The pie charts compare the annual expenditure by a particular school in the UK, in various years between 1981, 1991 and 2001.
In summary, the highest spending was allocated to teachers ‘ salaries, while for insurance very little money was spent over the period in question.
Looking into the details, most of the money was spent on teachers’ salaries. The percentages increased over the years, except the latter year 40%, 50% and 45% respectively. However, when it comes to other workers salaries , more money allocated (28%) in 1981 than the money spent on this category decreased over the years.
Regarding the supply of books the money spent was initially high, but as coming to 2001, the least income was designated to book resources. The remaining two categories namely, insurance, furniture and equipment had a little expenditure.
The essay lacks clear organization and logical flow. Transitions between ideas are abrupt, and some comparisons are unclear.
Suggestions
- Use linking words to improve flow.
- Organize the essay into clear paragraphs.
- Ensure comparisons are explicit and clear.
The vocabulary is adequate but lacks variety. Some phrases are repetitive.
Several grammatical errors and awkward phrasings are present. Sentence structures are often simple.
The essay addresses the task but lacks depth in analysis and detailed comparisons.
Suggestions
- Provide more detailed comparisons between years.
- Include specific percentages from the charts to support statements.
- Ensure all categories are discussed in detail.