The table and charts below give information about doctors in one country between 1986 and 2006
The two charts shows details about doctors in Australia within two decades from 1986 to 2006.
Overall, the number of doctors rose significantly year by year. Male doctors always recorded higher figures substantial contrast to women. When it comes to their place of birth both initial years Australian medics far more them that of borned in overses except for final year.
Focusing on the number of doctors first, by far the graetest numbers was seen in 2006 with 35,450, noticeably more than their number in 1996 and 1986 with respective figures of 29,060 and 23,720.
Regarding the genders of doctors in Australia, although the proportion of male medics dropped progressively, their numbers higher then that of females by the and of the year. Men accounted for about 75% in 1986 while women made up roughly 23%. The figure for female medics constituted approximately half that of their counterparts at 66 % in 1996, male doctors numbers declined negligibly to 60% within decade whilst that of females witnessed slight improvement to 38% by the end of the period.
As far as their place of birth is concerned, most doctors were Australians. Their proportional took up 62% in the initial year but the figure that then experienced marginal decrease to 58% in 1996. In 2006 both medics from Australia and Overseas constituted equal points, at 50%.
The essay presents information in a logical order, but there are issues with clarity and flow.
Suggestions
- Use linking words to improve the flow between sentences.
- Ensure each paragraph has a clear topic sentence.
- Avoid abrupt transitions between ideas.
Vocabulary is adequate but lacks variety and precision.
There are frequent grammatical errors that affect readability.
The essay addresses the task but lacks detailed analysis and comparison.
Suggestions
- Provide more detailed analysis of trends.
- Include more comparisons between the years and categories.